


6 Months

by Noelle12



Series: 6 Months [1]
Category: Hollyoaks
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-11-14
Updated: 2012-01-08
Packaged: 2017-10-26 01:38:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 28,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/277147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noelle12/pseuds/Noelle12
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Completely AU.  Set in the US in a lovely suburb outside New York City.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

I get out of the warm bed searching for my clothes on the floor. Shit, is that the time? I rush around in the dark trying to get dressed. Fuck, where’s my belt?

“Where you going, hun?” A voice calls out from the bed.

“To work.” I answer tersely as I try to straighten out my uniform in the dark. I’m going to be late at this rate.

“You coming back?” She asks.

What the fuck? Is this 20 questions? “No.” I snort.

“Why do you have to be so mean?” She complains.

“Gina, you know the score. We’re just having a bit of fun.” I say zipping up my boots and heading for the door.

“You asshole. Don’t call me again!” She shouts at my retreating back.

“Don’t worry, I won’t.” I say under my breath as I step out into the cool night air. I check my watch and fucking high tail it to my car. There is no way I’m going to get to work on time. Fuck!!

~oOo~

I rush through the door at the station much to the amusement of the desk sergeant.

“Cutting it a bit close, Dean.” Sergeant Hess greets me.

“Whatever.” I say rushing past him to punch in at the time clock.

“Hey Dean!” I hear him call down the hall.

“Be right there.” I call back.

I take a moment to catch my breath before I head back out to the dispatch desk.

“What’s up?” I ask.

“The new rookie is starting tonight.” He says.

“Yeah, so?” I ask. Is this supposed to mean something to me?

He rolls his eyes at me. “You really need to read your memos.”

“Me?! He’s riding with me?” I exclaim a little too loudly in the small space.

“Got it in one. You’re low man on the totem pole, so he’s all yours.” He explains.

“Where is he now?” I ask looking for a hint of the rookie.

“He’s in the break room finishing the last of his paperwork.” Hess responds jerking his head towards the hall.

Great! I get saddled with the new guy. Starting midnights this week and with a new guy to boot. What the hell are we going to do with eight hours of nothing going on? I usually spend midnights surfing the internet and taking cat naps. Shit! This is going to suck.

I slink to the break room to meet this guy. I just hope he’s not a complete loser. I stop in the doorway and see a young blonde guy sitting at one of the tables with a very large stack of papers in front of him. I roll my eyes and sit across from him, this should be fun.

He looks fresh faced and a little too eager. A few months in this place will turn him into a hardened smartass. Good luck to him.

“You done yet?” I ask.

He flicks his eyes up for a second, “Yeah, this is the last one.” He says finishing the last paper and he adds it to the stack, raising his eyes to mine and looking at me expectantly.

“Craig Dean.” I say sticking my hand out.

“John Paul McQueen.” He answers, taking my hand and shaking it.

“Looks like you’re stuck with me for the next six months.” I say flippantly.

“Okay. I need to turn these in first.” He declares indicating the papers and getting to his feet.

Ooh, I like him already. He gives nothing away and wants to be in charge. I wonder how long it will take to break him.


	2. Chapter 2

Finally, my first day, or should I say night, of actual work. I’ve been down at the station almost every day this week completing form after form and getting my uniform squared away. Lieutenant Dydick, dick being the correct term for him, kept calling with just one more thing. Getting my certifications so I can carry pepper spray, an asp and all the other crap I’m required to tote on my belt. God, he’s such a pain in the ass. If he had half a brain, he’d be dangerous.

They assign me to midnights. I guess being the new guy gives you no privileges. They must figure it’s where I’ll do the least amount of damage. And I have to ride shotgun for the first six months. I hope they don’t stick me with an idiot. I don’t think I can take one more stupid person in authority right now.

I’ve met most of the day shift, the detectives and brass. I’ll meet the other officers on my shift soon enough. Hopefully they won’t be a bunch a losers like I had to put up with at the academy. That was a long six months getting up early and running and running and running, then dealing with retarded morons in class. Most of shift work will require sitting on my ass in a squad car, so what was with all the running? And after seeing the other officers in the department, I can see that running is not going to be a part of my work day, or night.

I can’t stop myself from thinking as I put my uniform on and make sure everything is shined and pressed and as sharp as it can be. I’ll admit I’m a little nervous, first day on the job and everything, but I’m trained for it and my skills as a mediator were honed very well having to deal with my sisters my whole life. Finally, I check myself out one more time, ‘looking good’ I think and head out to the station.

************************************************************************

I’m 15 minutes early for my shift and the lieutenant on duty tells me there’s a stack of paper that still needs my signature or other missing information waiting for me. What the fuck? I feel like I’ve signed my whole life away to get this job. Now they want it in blood?

The station is a buzz of activity as they switch from the evening to the night shift. Exchanging car keys and updating the incoming officers on what calls are active right now. I know you’re thinking who’s protecting the town while everyone hangs out at the dispatch desk, but there’s a position called late man who works a half hour past shift time to cover the conversion.

I chat a little with the guys and girl, yeah there’s one female officer, before I settle down in the break room with my stack of papers searching for the missing information they still need. You’d think someone would just tell me, but I’m expected to inspect each one for the missing info. What a waste of time. This is complete bullshit.

************************************************************************

I wade through acres of papers for the next half hour as the evening shift goes home and the night shift hits the road. No one has even come looking for me and I wonder if they even know I’m here. Whatever. I really can’t be bothered with it. I finally reach the last sheet when an officer comes in and sits down across from me. I don’t even look up at him.

“You done yet?” He asks. What kind of greeting is that? Asshole.

I briefly look up at him. He’s a lot younger than I thought he was going to be. His uniform is a little wrinkled like he got dressed in the dark. I wonder, for a moment, how he got stuck with me. He must be the last person to join the department and training me is his punishment. That thought almost makes me smile.

“Yeah, this is the last one.” I answer signing my name for hopefully the last time and placing the paper on the stack in front of me. I look across to him, waiting to see what he wants.

“Craig Dean.” He says offering his hand.

“John Paul McQueen.” I answer, taking his hand in a firm grip and shaking it.

“Looks like you’re stuck with me for the next six months.” He says resignedly.

“Okay. I need to turn these in first.” I say picking up the papers and getting to my feet.

I hope this loser is prepared to teach me something I don’t already know.


	3. Chapter 3

**Dean**

We drop the papers off on the secretary’s desk when Hess starts bellowing down the hall again. “Dean!”

“What?” I yell back. He’s starting to get on my nerves.

“Get out here!” He answers. I roll my eyes at McQueen and he stifles a laugh.

We stroll out to the desk. “You called?” I ask nonchalantly as I lean on the counter surrounding the top of the desk with McQueen behind me.

“Hmm. What could I possibly want, Dean? Maybe that you actually go out and do your job.” Hess says sarcastically.

“Fine, we’re going.” I huff.

“Nice to meet you. McQueen, right?” Hess says to the rookie looking past me.

“John Paul.” He answers extending his hand around me to Hess. I roll my eyes and go to collect my car keys from the cabinet.

I guess we’re rolling in 415 tonight. It’s the only set of keys left. Only seven and a half hours to go. Should be a nice long night.

 **McQueen**

I stand there waiting for Dean so we can get out on the road. I’m pretty anxious to see what it’s all about. Hess informs me that at the end of my midnight shifts, I’ll have to sit the dispatch desk for a week to get a feel for what goes on in the station and how to handle the desk and radio. That should be really boring. Can’t wait.

I’m also expected to take court duty once I’m on the evening shift. I guess there’s a bit more to the job than I thought. There’s also traffic duty and crossing the faithful on Sundays so they can make it in and out of church safely. These are all overtime and voluntary, but I sure could use the double time pay. Being in the academy for the last six months has left me pretty much broke and on the verge of moving back in with my mother. I shudder at the thought of that.

Dean comes out and we say good bye to Hess and head out to the car. I ride shotgun as Dean slides behind the wheel.

 **Dean**

I put the car in gear. Thinking shit! I wish I’d read the memo about the rookie sooner, I probably could have planned some stuff for us to go over, but really my sleep pattern is so disrupted, I can’t even think straight. As if echoing my thoughts, I hear McQueen yawning loudly in the passenger seat as I pull out of the station lot.

“Tired?” I ask.

“Yeah, they had me doing so much paperwork this week, I haven’t been able to get enough sleep during the day to work nights.” He explains then he continues, “Did that even make sense?” He asks with a laugh.

“Uh huh. I understand the confused thoughts of the overwhelmingly tired.” He glares at me and then chuckles. Okay, this isn’t going too bad. We might even get along a bit. “So what’s with you? What’s your deal?” I ask next.

“What do you mean?” He asks looking at me confused.

“Why did you decide to become a cop?” I elaborate as I try to find a nice dark place to hide until a call comes in.

“Oh, people always ask that. Honestly, I was sick of all the losers in this world taking and taking and never giving anything in return. Men smacking women around and stuff like that. Made me want to do something about it.” He explains almost angrily like it’s personal.

 **McQueen**

“Okay.” He replies timidly to my little tirade. It just makes my blood boil how people get away with crap all the time.

I figure out turnabout is fair play, “What about you? Why are you a cop?” I ask Officer Dean.

“Um, well… no particular reason. I got an AA in Criminal Justice and figured it was the best fit for me.” Is the stammering answer he provides as we cruise down the road.

We relax into an easy silence as he navigates a few turns here and there finally stopping behind a deli. There’s nothing much going on tonight. We chat a bit, discuss where we came from. There is no radio chatter at all except for cars calling in their dinner breaks. I can’t even think about eating. It’s the middle of the freaking night for God’s sake. Who eats now? I should be asleep. I just hope it doesn’t take too long to adjust to this.


	4. Chapter 4

**McQueen**

Two more thrusts and I empty myself into a condom. I pull out and go to clean up. Checking the time on the bedside clock, I realize that I have to be at work in less than 30 minutes. Time to move on. I pick my uniform up off the floor where it was discarded earlier and work on trying to look my best. Hell, I always look my best. But I’ve got to get this grin off my face, so I change it to a smirk. Not better, but it’ll do. Going to bed early for six months during the academy did nothing for my sex life and it’s been awhile if you know what I mean. Hence, the grin.

“Babe?” A voice calls out from the bed.

“Yeah?” I respond tucking in my shirt.

“Where you going?” She asks in a tiny voice.

“Got to go to work.” I reply trying to locate my belt.

“Now? It’s late.” She queries.

“My shift starts soon. I’ve got to go. I’ll call you.” I lie heading for the door.

“Whatever.” Is the response. I bet she’s pretty used to this, attracted to the uniform.

**********************************************************************

I pull into the lot right behind Dean. He’s on time for once and I can’t help but make a comment on it.

“Found the station okay tonight?” I ask as a greeting.

“Fuck you.” He returns.

“How eloquent.” I respond and Dean laughs.

“You’re in a good mood tonight.” He comments.

“Yeah, things are looking a bit better. Might even be able to put up with you for the next eight hours.”

“Oh it’s like that. Don’t think I don’t feel the same way, bro.” He retorts. “Let’s get this over with, shall we?”

We punch in and head to the desk for our assignment.

 **Dean**

I take a good look at McQueen under the station lights and he looks well fucked. “What were you up to before work tonight?” I ask pulling him into the break room.

“Nothing.” He answers smirking.

“You look like you just got laid. Rumpled clothes, blushed cheeks.” I observe.

“I – I…” He stammers.

“Oh look at stutter boy over here. You got your rocks off. So, who’s the lucky lady?” I ask.

“Um… no one.” He replies. I watch him closely to see if he’s lying. He’s smiling like an idiot.

“Come on you can tell me.” I prompt.

“Um, no I really can’t.” He sighs, “I don’t remember her name. She might have put her name in my phone, though, but I can’t really remember.”

“Post orgasmic memory loss, huh?” I say. “Let’s check the phone.” I pull his phone out of the holder on his belt and scroll through the contact list. “Whoa, there are a lot of chicks in here. Let’s see Carmel?”

“That’s my sister.” He says wrinkling his nose in distaste.

“Cheryl?”

“No.”

“Hannah?”

“No.”

“Jacqui?”

“Definitely no.”

“Mercedes?”

“Ew, no.”

“Michaela?”

“Ugh, no. Maybe she didn’t put her number in.” He thinks for a moment, “She had a J sounding name, Jeannie, Jenny, Gigi.”

“Could it be Gina?” I ask.

“Yeah, that’s it.” He responds.

“Were you in uniform when you met her?” I get a real sinking feeling about this.

“Yeah why?” He asks.

“She’s a groupie, does all the guys. I had her just the other night.” I respond as nonchalantly as I can. I hope he’s not into this chick, but he looks like he doesn’t care about it at all.

“Oh. Guess I’ve been inducted into Gina’s hall of fame.” He says with a laugh and shrugs like it’s no big deal.

“Dean, McQueen! You planning on doing your jobs any time tonight?” Hess yells down the hall at us.

“We’re going, jeez, give us a moment.” I yell back.

************************************************************************

 **McQueen**

We head out to the car, I can’t seem to get the grin off my face. Fuck I need to work on that. When Dean said she was a groupie, I was not surprised. But a fuck’s a fuck. I’m not too particular about it. Guys, girls, it’s all the same. Depends on what I’m in the mood for. Dean seems to have gotten pretty quiet as we head out of the lot hitting the streets for another night of mind numbing boredom.

 **Dean**

McQueen is still grinning to himself. What’s the matter with him? I hope he doesn’t fall for Gina, she’s a real barracuda. But since he couldn’t even remember her name, I don’t think that should be a problem. But what is up with the grin? He surely wasn’t a virgin before tonight, was he?


	5. Chapter 5

**Dean**

“415 come in.” I awake with a start, wiping drool from my chin trying to figure out where I am.

McQueen is laughing as he picks up the mic, “415”

“We have an alarm reaction at 252 Reading Terrace.” The disembodied voice answers.

“Commercial or residential?” McQueen asks.

“Commercial.”

“What’s showing?”

“Rear door.”

“Call the owner, on our way.”

“Received 02:32.”

I’m pretty impressed, he handled that well. I put the car in gear and drive down to Reading. The street is deserted. There is not a soul in sight. We pull up to 252 and walk around to the rear door.

“Light up the window.” I tell McQueen, “See if anything’s moving in there. I’ll check the door.” We look over the building and meet back agreeing that everything seems okay. McQueen calls in the all clear. And I call Hess on his Nextel. “Hess, this guy showing?” I ask.

“Said he’s on his way, coming from Wallington, should be there in another five.” Is his response.

“Okay.”

We stand around, McQueen points out some drool I’ve still got on my face. Nice, I think, now I look like a total fool.

“What kind of business is this anyway?” He asks.

The building belongs to Latin Percussion. “They make drums.” I answer, which causes his eyes to widen a bit and he shuffles nervously.

He hitches his thumb up, “I’m just going to wait in the car.”

“Oh no you’re not,” I tell him grabbing his arm before he moves away. “You’re going to wait here with me, so we can talk to this clown and finish the call.”

“Fine.” He spits suddenly pissed off pulling out of my grip.

“What’s the matter with you?” He’s acting like a brat who was awoken from his nap when that should be me.

“Nothing.” He sulks.

“Is this about that chick before?”

“Who?” He thinks a moment. “No.”

“Then what?” I ask exasperated by his change in demeanor.

“Nothing.” He says all sour faced.

We’re interrupted by a car pulling into the lot and watch as it parks in front of the building. A young man hops out and heads over to us.

“What is it this time?” He asks.

Oh no, I ask the questions around here. “Your name, sir?”

“Martin Blank Jr.” He responds looking at the building like it might do a trick for him.

“Are you the owner?” I ask.

“No, I manage it, my father owns it.” He explains.

“Do you have the keys?” I ask. “And I’ll need your father’s info too.”

“Yes, no problem.” He answers.

“We checked the exterior and saw no sign of entry. There doesn’t appear to be anything moving in there. Would you like Officer McQueen and I to check the building while we’re here.” At the mention of McQueen’s name, Blank’s head whips over to him.

“John Paul?” Blank asks. John Paul visibly reddens even in the dark parking lot.

“Yeah.” He answers like it pains him to speak.

“I… I thought you moved away. You never returned my phone calls. Hell, I even called your mother and everything… She said you’d gone away.” He says a little sadly.

McQueen snorts a laugh at him. “She’s such a drama queen. I just went to the police academy, not Iraq.” A change in tone, “Nice to see you again, Martin.” Swiftly changing subject, “So, you’re in charge of the place now?”

“Yes, my father decided to semi-retire leaving me to it.” He studies McQueen in his uniform with a predatory look. “We should get together sometime, you know, catch up on old times.” Blank adds a wink to punctuate this statement.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” McQueen lies to him smoothly. I clear my throat.

“Can we get back to this please?” I interrupt.

“Sure, sure. Let me unlock the door and we can take a look around.” Blank recovers quickly.

 **McQueen**

Crap! I’ve spent so much time hiding my bisexuality from the department. I know how homophobic the police department can be. And here comes Martin walking across the parking lot towards us. Who knows what Dean will do with this information. I make my face into an impassive mask and stand tall. I won’t deny who I am, but I’m not going to volunteer the information either. I’m not even listening until I hear my name and Martin turns to look at me more closely. Shit! I can feel the blood rushing to my face. Thank God it’s dark out.

I hear Martin complaining about contacting my mother because I didn’t call, snort, what a desperate loser. We had a bit of fun and I moved on. I try changing the subject…

Wait, did he just fucking wink at me? I lie so smoothly to him, I don’t even realize what I’m saying, then Dean saves my ass and the next thing I know, I’m following Dean through the building. We find nothing out of place, everything is secure and I call it in. I almost don’t want to get back in the car and be alone with Dean now. He’s sure to mock me for the rest of the night.

 **Dean**

I’m stunned at this revelation into McQueen. I feel like I barely know him at all. But I’m not one to judge.


	6. Chapter 6

**Dean**

I follow him back to the car and watch as he hesitates getting in on the passenger side. But he squares up his shoulders and slides in next to me. “You ready to get something to eat? I’m starved.” I ask.

He smiles gratefully and nods. “Sure, whatever.” He answers. He’s starting to sound more and more like me every day. I call out our dinner break and we head over to the only place in town that’s open at 3 AM. Hess asked that I bring him a decent cup of coffee so he could stop drinking the station’s swill.

We slide into a booth near the rear of the diner. Patty, our waitress, comes over to take our drink order. Being it’s after three in the morning, we’re pretty much the only two people in the place. “Coffee, boys?” She asks in her husky smoke tinged voice.

“Yes, please.” I answer throwing her a wink. “How’s my favorite girl, Patty?”

“I’m doing fine, Craig? Hun?” She asks looking over at McQueen.

“The same.” He answers.

“Be right out.” She turns and heads out.

 **McQueen**

I rub my eyes feeling the weariness of the early morning hour. When I open my eyes Dean is studying me. “What’s the matter?” I ask him.

“Are you okay?” He responds.

“Yeah, just tired. I’m still not used to these hours.” I kind of lie. Seeing Martin again also threw me, but I am really tired too.

Dean nods and clears his throat then leans in a little, “So… um… back there, you know that guy Blank?” He stammers out.

Oh crap is that why he’s looking at me like a weird little curiosity. “Yeah, we kind of, I don’t know if you could call it dated, but we hooked up a few times.” I explain.

“A few times? He was begging for it back there.” He responds with a smile and a look of admiration on his face. “Do you mind if I ask what happened?”

I’m taken aback, is he asking about our sex life? “What do you mean what happened? You want like a replay?” I snap at him. Un-fucking-believable. Pervert.

“Oh no! Oh.” He quickly turns red, his eyes dart back and forth, lowering his voice, “No, I meant why you broke up or stopped seeing each other?”

“Oh.” Now I feel totally stupid and can feel the blush appear on my face. “Sorry for, uh, thinking… Anyway… well… it was nothing serious. I got hired at the department and sent to the academy. I didn’t need any distractions, so he just kind of fell by the wayside.”

“So… yeah… okay.” He stammers rubbing the back of his neck. Patty comes back to take our orders interrupting the tension that has settled between us.

I hand her the menu and look over and he’s studying me again, like he might have missed a clue or something.

“What?” I bark at him.

“Are you gay?” He asks bluntly.

Snort. “No. Why would you ask that? I slept with that Jenny girl the other night remember?” I respond.

“You mean Gina?” Dean corrects me.

“Okay, whatever.” I agree grudgingly.

“I thought…” He trails off.

“What?” I snap at him.

“Maybe you were gay and lied about being with a girl.” He reasons.

“I wouldn’t lie about something like that, Dean. I’m not lying about any of it. I date guys and girls. So what?” I say sighing. He was starting to rile me up, but now I’m just too tired to care anymore.

“So what indeed.” He responds.

“Now what does that mean?” I ask completely perplexed, is he mocking me?

“I don’t know.” He says rubbing the back of his neck. “You don’t meet many other bisexuals out there.”

“What do you mean ‘other’?” I ask.

“Oh… um… me too.” He completely stuns me with this little nugget of info.

“What?” I manage to ask wide eyed.

“I kind of date guys and girls too.” He reveals in his slow Dean roundabout way.

************************************************************************

 **Dean**

Our food arrives and after taking my first bite, I come up with another question. “So, when did you kind of suspect that you weren’t completely straight?”

McQueen swallows the food in his mouth and let’s out a short laugh. “I guess it was the time I was caught making out with my date’s brother at the junior prom.”

My jaw drops, “Oh my God, that was you?”

“Yup.” He says not even a bit abashed.

“I was a senior, but I didn’t even remember the name until now. It was all over the school the next day.” I sit back and remember the gossip that spread like wildfire over the campus. I’m in awe. I kind of remember it now. He was all like no big deal and the other guy completely freaked out and denied everything.

He glances at me, “So what about you? When did you first figure it out?”

“Okay… when I was about 16, I was having some pretty impure thoughts about my brother’s friend who was a firefighter.” I reflect with a far off look in my eye getting lost in the memory of Ben’s body.

“Is he still a firefighter?” He eagerly asks, an evil little glint in his eye.

“Yeah. Why?” I look at him suspiciously.

“I figure we can call in an alarm and wait for your object of affection to show up.” He reveals his evil plan laughing maniacally.

“Don’t be stupid, that’s old news. I’ve been there and done that a long time ago.” I explain nonchalantly.

“You dog.” He says throwing a napkin at me and completely cracking up.

Patty comes back over, “You boys need anything else?”

“No, just the check, Patty… oh wait… and your sweet ass.” I say putting my arm around her waist and pulling her in. She smacks me on the arm. “I’ll be right back with that check, sugar.”

Once Patty leaves, I have another question. “Which do you prefer?” I ask him.

“I don’t have a preference.” He lies again. Everyone has a preference.

“Come on. You either like pussy a little bit more than cock or the other way around.” I clarify the question.

“I… I guess it depends on what I’m in the mood for. You know, want a blow job, go for a guy. Want some slip and slide action, go for the girl. Whatever. I like the variety.”

“Hmm… Never thought of it that way.” I muse on that a moment.

“What about you?” He asks suddenly.

“I was going to say girls, but you got me thinking now…” I trail off.

“About what?” He curiously asks.

“Cock.” I say and he laughs.

“That’s one thing I don’t mind thinking about.” He agrees and winks at me. He just winked at me.

“Let’s get out of here before Hess sends a patrol car after us.” I say standing up and throwing some cash on the table heading up front to pay the bill.


	7. Chapter 7

**McQueen**

“McQueen!” is the greeting I receive from Dean as I make my way to punch in tonight. “Check out what I picked up tonight.” He teases.

“All right. What is it?” I ask as I try to still his hand that is waving a CD case around crazily. My mouth drops open. “Is that what I think it is?” I ask stunned. Dean has complete crap taste in music and is holding the hottest dance mix that’s been released in a really long time.

“Uh huh.” He nods.

“This is aces, Dean.” I say patting him on the shoulder.

 **Dean**

He just patted my shoulder. Aces he said. Shaking myself out of the reverie, I had gone to the music store to pick up the newest Daughtry album when the CD caught my eye. McQueen had been talking about it for a week now and hadn’t been able to find it anywhere.

“I can’t wait to play this in the car.” McQueen says checking the liner notes on the label clearly excited about it. He pockets the case.

“You ready to do this?” McQueen asks me cocking his head towards the door.

Feeling a bit weird tonight, I thread my arm through his and say, “Shall we?”

He nods to me, “We shall.” And we skip to the door singing “We’re off to catch the bad guys…” to the tune of the Wizard of Oz, which causes us to get a very strange look from Hess who is watching from the desk.

“You better get some sleep tomorrow. I think the lack of it is starting to affect your brains.” Hess calls as we dissolve into uncontrollable laughter near the door.

I practically fall into the car wiping my eyes. Maybe it wasn’t that funny, but it is a full moon tonight and I have to give some credit to McQueen for going along with it.

************************************************************************

Later on during our shift:

“What are you doing over there?” I ask McQueen. He’s been making these noises like oh, and hmm for the past 10 minutes while surfing the net. He’s actually making me kind of nervous like he’s looking through porn or something.

“Bingo!” He shouts really excited.

“What?” I ask startled from his outburst.

“You are going to love me.” He says smugly.

“Why?” I ask confused.

“I just scored us some tickets to the Kings of Leon concert at the IZOD Center.” He answers looking for a reaction.

“Okay.” I answer slowly because I really have no clue what he’s talking about.

“I think a little excitement is called for here.” He says getting a little pissed off, eyes burning bright in the glare from the laptop screen.

“You think?” I respond wishing he would elaborate without making me show my ignorance.

“Come on, Kings of Leon… Your Sex is on Fire?” He prompts.

“Oh they sing that song.” I say.

“Dean, you have so much to learn.” He says sadly shaking his head. “So you coming with me or what?”

“Yeah, definitely.” I respond trying to wipe the enormous grin off my face.

 

 **McQueen**

"Excellent." I respond, but was he kidding me? He doesn’t know who Kings of Leon are. I think it might be time for some musical education for the great Officer Dean. I crack open the CD he bought and walk him through every track. His ignorance is cute though. It’s funny how he bought the CD and had no idea what any of the songs or artists were.

*********************************************************************

Finally a call comes through. A fire alarm at Marcal, the paper plant. This could be nothing or it could be everything. We pull up out front just before the fire trucks arrive. There is always someone on shift at the plant, and we meet with the shift supervisor, he indicates that the alarm sounded in the pulp storage room.

We just stand around because this is our call, but not our job as the firefighters clamber off the trucks and head into the building to secure the scene. I radio in that nothing is showing and that the fire department is on scene. We stand around and chit chat with the fire chief waiting for a report from the guys in the building. Finally, a voice cuts through on the radio.

"False alarm, Chief, no indication of heat."

"Pull everyone out." The chief replies.

I watch as the guys come out of the building. One of them stops and talks to Dean giving him a friendly pat on the back. Wow, this guy is good looking. Dean calls me over, "McQueen, I want you to meet Ben. Ben, this is John Paul McQueen. The latest addition to the department." I shake his hand checking him out. We exchange a greeting and I completely agree that he is definitely worth an impure thought or two.

"Craig, it's been too long, we should get together soon." Ben suggests. Dean quickly casts his eyes in my direction and rubs the back of his neck.

"Yeah, that'd be great, but with my schedule, it's really difficult to, uh, make plans." Dean replies.

"Well think about it." Ben says.

Ben's truck is anxious to leave and the guys are shouting at him to get on or find his own way back. He quickly departs and we follow suit radioing in to headquarters the results.

We're getting closer to sunrise as we head back to the parking lot over looking Cherry Hill Park. It’s become our morning routine now, just sitting in the car waiting for the sun to rise.

"Why don't you want to get together with Ben?" I ask Dean breaking the silence between us.

"Well... we were together awhile ago and I've moved on since then." is the quiet reply he offers.

"But he's really good looking." I respond.

"Yeah, but looks aren't everything, John Paul." He answers.


	8. Chapter 8

**McQueen**

I’m secretly pleased when Dean tells Ben that he’s too busy to get together with him. What’s going on with me? Am I really that possessive of my new friend? I shake my head of this thought. Did he just call me John Paul? I think that’s a first.

We’re on the last of the midnight shifts and will be starting on the morning shift in two days. I say good bye to Dean and try to figure out how I’m going to adjust to the new schedule in 48 hours. I try to keep myself awake during the day, so I can sleep at night, but I end up catatonic on the couch while watching the afternoon soaps and judge shows.

Waking up from my stupor, I head to the shower and convince my sister that we need a night out. I think I’ve become totally pathetic when I have to call Jacqui to go out with me. This fucking sucks.

When I arrive at Boulevard Bar, I realize Jacqui has called for back up and the rest of my sisters are sitting at the table too. I go over and join them thrilled that one of them actually bought me a beer and it is waiting on the table. I haven’t seen them in so long due to working crazy hours and weekends, it sure feels good to be home.

 **Dean**

I’m exhausted. We’re on a shift switch and I have to get my shit together in the next 48 hours. I try going to the rec center to work out, then I drink lots of coffee and try to organize my apartment that has taken on the state of a college frat house. But I find myself passed out on the couch with the TV on tuned to Jerry Springer and all the bleeping is causing me to have weird dreams of being stuck in traffic.

I call my sister Steph to meet me at the bar near my apartment. It’s not the nicest place, but it’s okay for a quick drink and a chat. Is this how low I’ve sunk that I have to call my sister so I don’t have to go out alone? I consider calling McQueen, but I think he sees enough of me at work and I don’t want to intrude on his personal time. Why am I thinking about him anyway? I’m running late, but I know Steph will be even later.

Pulling open the door to the bar, I scan the room and of course no Steph. But McQueen is here seated with five women. How the hell does he do it? He notices me immediately and shouts across the room. “Dean!”

 **McQueen**

It’s weird I was just thinking about Dean and turned my head and there he was. I call out to him and he drags his feet over like he doesn’t want to come to the table. I introduce him to my five lovely sisters who are buying me drinks for some reason tonight. I guess absence does make the heart grow fonder. Dean brightens considerably after the introductions and turns on the charm while greeting the McQueen women.

“I, uh, have to call my sister to see if she completely flaked or is just running late.” Dean explains heading out for someplace quiet.

“He’s really cute, John Paul.” Carmel announces to the table once he’s out of sight.

“He’s okay, a bit scrawny.” Mercedes says with her trademark smirk.

“He seems quite nice.” Tina adds in with a shy smile.

“Ugh, he’s not all that.” Michaela throws out there with a look of disgust on her face.

“Sh, what do you think about him, John Paul?” Jacqui asks looking at me expectantly.

My mind goes into overdrive. What do I think about him? He’s my best friend, my partner, who I would lay down my life to protect, and even though we’re very different, I can read him like a book. “I guess he’s the guy I work with. But it’s nice to see you guys haven’t changed though.” I answer noncommittally with a smile.

Dean comes back to the table. “My sister completely forgot we were meeting.” He explains.

“You’re more than welcome to join us.” Jacqui trawls staring him down. He glances at me, but I just raise my eyebrows. I love Jacqui, but she can be very intimidating to strangers.

 **Dean**

I can’t believe Steph totally bailed on me. She’s such an airhead sometimes. I’m sitting with McQueen and his sisters. I’m not sure if I should be scared or if I should take the opportunity to embarrass McQueen by drawing out some childhood stories from them. I decide that fear is not the way to go, plus I usually carry a gun, so facing down a few girls should be simple. But I hadn’t bet on the McQueen sisters.

I get myself a drink from the bar and pull up a chair between John Paul and one of the blonde ones, I think it might be Michaela. Jacqui starts off the story telling by reminding Mercedes about something McQueen had done when he was little, “He was so cute, the only boy in a pack of girls. He didn’t stand a chance.” Jacqui smirks, “So we would dress him up and try out different outfits and makeup on him. Remember, Mercy?” She laughs hysterically.

Mercedes chimes in, “Remember when we put him in the ballerina outfit and had him dance Swan Lake for us?”

“Or… or the time he was caught playing doctor with the Hanson girl down the street?” Jacqui throws in for balance. I can see Tina hiding a laugh. She seems to be the nice one. And Michaela is sulking beside me that her antics aren’t being relived for my enjoyment.

“And then a week later, he was caught with the O’Neill boy.” Carmel adds on. I laugh along at the tales while McQueen gets redder and redder. I can feel the heat of his embarrassment and almost feel sorry for him.

Jacqui glares at Carmel. “Carmel.” She adds in a warning tone.

“It’s okay, Jacq, he knows.” McQueen speaks up.

Then the pack turns on me and asks about how McQueen’s doing at work. “Nothing much happens on the night shift, so there are no embarrassing stories to share.” I offer as an explanation.

“Craig,” Jacqui catches my attention and I lean in to hear her. “What do you think of our baby brother?”

I’m a little thrown by the question. What do I think? That he’s the best friend I’ve had in a really long time, perhaps ever. That as an officer of the law, I would lay my life down to protect him. That despite our differences, we still get along really well. Or that he’s really good looking and easy to talk to. Yeah, I think all those things. But what I say is, “I think he’s a really good police officer and a really great friend.” And down the rest of my beer before she can ask another question and avoid looking at anyone else at the table either especially the blue eyed man sitting next to me.


	9. Chapter 9

**Dean**

I smack the alarm clock that is blaring at me to haul my ass out of bed. What is that bright shining ball in the sky? I feel like it’s been so long since I’ve gone to work while the sun was up. I better get there on time. Day shift is when the chief and the rest of the brass work, which means Tommy will be working. He is by far the funniest man I’ve ever met and as Captain of Detectives, he has the best stories too. I pull into the lot and notice McQueen is not there yet. Where the fuck is he?

I punch in and hear voices coming from the break room. I step in to find Tommy and McQueen laughing uproariously about something.

“Hey Craig.” Tommy greets me. “It’s been awhile. How was midnights?”

“They sucked.” I reply. “McQueen.” I greet him sitting down at the table.

“Hey Dean.” He responds.

“Tommy telling you some ridiculous made up story of his?” I ask McQueen.

“Asshole, my stories are not fiction. You can’t make this shit up. People really are that stupid.” Tommy replies with a smirk on his face.

“Hey, where’s your car?” I say nodding at McQueen.

“Oh, I, er, had a friend drop me off. I was a little too drunk to drive last night and left my car at the bar.” I nod at him. “Shit! I guess I’ll have to find some time to pick it up today.” He remembers. Fuck, he went out drinking without me is all I can think. I’m cool. He has other friends. That’s okay. I smile at him.

“We can get it after our shift. I’ll drop you off.” I offer.

“That’d be awesome.” He smiles at me.

“405.” My radio crackles and gets hit with screeching feedback.

“Turn that down.” McQueen grimaces from the loud noise. “I’m still a little hungover.”

“Shit sorry.” I reply. Tommy just watches us hiding a smile. “What?” I ask him.

“Nothing.” He smiles enigmatically. “Me and you need to talk later though.” He adds on.

 **McQueen**

My head is pounding when I get up this morning. What the fuck was I doing last night? I disentangle myself from the arm that’s lying across me as I go to take a shower. I look back at the bed and smile at the body occupying it. He was hot last night and not too shabby in the harsh light of day either. I take a shower, have some coffee and wake my bed partner up. I have got to get to work and he’s going to have to drive me.

Walking through the door, I’m assaulted by Tommy Johnson, Chief of Detectives. He pulls me into the break room where I grab some crappy coffee and settle in for one of Tommy’s stories. But he turns it around and asks how I was liking the job so far and how Dean was as a mentor.

My brain is still a little mushy, but I think I managed to pull off a slightly alert response.

“Midnights totally suck.” I tell him, “But Dean’s been great in showing me the ropes.” He actually looks surprised at this. “What? Is he a total fuck up and I shouldn’t listen to him?”

“No… no, uh, he can be a little reserved, not quite one to share, but he knows his job and does it very well when he’s not all attitude.” Tommy answers. “I was just surprised he was teaching you anything.”

“Why does that make me feel insignificant?” I ask, “You put me with him for six months thinking he was going to totally fuck it up.”

“That wasn’t me. That was Dydick who does the assignments. You can’t take his judgment too seriously.” Tommy confides quietly.

“I can’t believe he’s in that powerful of a position.” I whisper leaning in.

“Well, he’s been here a long time and he’s really not capable of doing anything else. Plus, he’s the chief’s brother-in-law.” Tommy says winking at me.

“That explains it.” I laugh. “Does the chief have a sister who’s single?” I ask causing Tommy to crack up.

Then he launches into a story of how he was chasing a drug dealer through the woods at the water works when he ran smack into a giant spider web and got all caught up in it. “They called me Spiderman for weeks after that.” He ends causing me to burst out with laughter when Dean comes in.

 **Dean**

“Hey McQueen, I was hoping you could get me Mercedes’ number.” I tease him.

“No can do, man. She said you’re too scrawny.” He teases me back.

“Hey! I’m not scrawny.” I respond indignantly.

“Carmel thought you were cute though. You want her number?” He comes back. I think about them all sitting around and discussing me and it makes me feel weird.

“When did you guys talk about me?” I curiously ask.

“You were all we talked about the next day at brunch.” He responds. I mull this over for a minute.

“I was not, you little shit!” I yell at him.

“No, but you thought about it for a minute.” He laughs.

“415” crackles over the radio.

“Crap,” keying up the mic, “415.” I respond.

“Report of a car crash, corner of Midland and Market.”

“Any injuries?”

“None reported.” The voice answers.

“On our way.”

“Received 08:35.”

“Let’s go.” I say to McQueen.

************************************************************************

We pick up lunch and bring it back to the station. Tommy is waiting for me in his office, so I leave McQueen at the desk where he starts flirting with Dee, the day shift dispatcher.

“Hey.” I say to Tommy sitting down at the chair in front of his desk and tearing into my sandwich.

“Hey.” He replies, sizing me up.

I roll my eyes at him. “Are you just going to stare or did you want to see me for a reason?”

“Well, I was wondering what’s going on with you and McQueen.” He ponders aloud.

I almost choke on my lunch, “What do you mean by that?”

“Craig, you are being awfully nice to him. He said that you’re teaching him things and you even apologized when he complained that your radio was too loud. The Craig Dean that I know would do none of those things.” He lists for me.

“And?...” Is my completely brilliant response.

“And it’s just not like you.” He says. I take another bite of my sandwich stalling to formulate a response.

“We’ve become friends and I want him to do well and not get himself killed because of improper training.” I explain.

“Come on. You can tell Uncle Tommy anything.” He tells me.

“Really, there’s nothing going on. We’re just friends.” I say again.

 **McQueen**

I get a call from Jacqui and head out to the parking lot for some privacy. Jacqui is convinced I’m in love with Dean and it’s just a matter of time before I figure it out. If I was so in love with him, why am I sleeping with other people? Granted the guy last night was pretty skinny and had dark hair and eyes, but so do a lot of people. That means nothing, doesn’t it?

“Jacq, there’s nothing going on, we’re just friends.” I defend myself.

“John Paul, you talk about him all the time. It’s Dean did this or Dean said that.” She astutely replies.

“That’s because we spend a lot of time together in a very small space.” I explain.

“Pht.” Is her worldly answer.

“Did you just pht me?” I ask astonished.

“Yes, I don’t go on and on about my workmates.” She reasons.

“He’s not just my workmate, he’s my mentor.” I say.

 **Dean**

“Craig, don’t bullshit me. You care for this guy or you wouldn’t even bother with him.” Tommy says.

“Yeah, I care as my partner. The guy who’s supposed to back me up. Not the way you’re hinting at.” I say.

“Fine. But think about it. Shouldn’t you be getting back to work?” I nod standing up, “Clean this shit up too. And one more thing, I’m here when you want to talk.” He says softly, but I just glare at him.

I leave his office and look around for McQueen and finally find him on the phone in the parking lot. I nod for him to get in the car.

“Just drop it, Jacq,” I hear him say, “I’ve got to get back to work.” He sighs, “Yeah, later, bye.”

“Everything okay?” I ask once the door closes.

“Yeah.” He answers not revealing anything. I hate when he gets like this.

“You and Tommy okay?” He asks looking over at me.

“Yeah, he just wanted to know how we were getting along.” I say.

“Oh he asked me about that this morning.” He says.

“Apparently.” I reply.

“What?” He asks.

I just shrug and we hit the road in silence. There’s a tension between us, but it might just be me.

 **McQueen**

There’s a tension, but I think I’m the only one who feels it. I lose myself in thought about what Jacqui said. Am I falling for him? Things are so easy between us. We’re friends. Sure he’s hot, but I’ve had hot friends before who I didn’t want to sleep with. Shit! That’s a total lie. I’ve never had a hot friend I didn’t sleep with. I am so screwed.

 **Dean**

I stop the car and park at the Walgreens to watch traffic. My mind is numb as the cars cruise by. Fucking jerk is all I can think of. Why is Tommy fucking with my head? All I can think about is McQueen and with him only an arm stretch away, it’s making it difficult to straighten my thoughts out. How do I feel about him? Sure he’s hot, but really not my type. Although that guy I picked up the other night was blonde and blue eyed too. That doesn’t mean anything, does it?


	10. Chapter 10

**Dean**

“So where’s your car?” I ask him as we slide into my car.

“River Edge.” He responds sliding down in the seat.

“Fuck, McQueen, you owe me for this.” I can’t believe he’s got me driving him all the way out there.

“Fine, I’ll buy you dinner tomorrow. Just drive.” He commands.

“Whatever.” I reply. “Where exactly am I going?”

“Take 4, then a left on Kinderkamack and it’s right there.” Comes the answer.

“Feathers!? You went to Feathers!” I exclaim.

“Yeah, so?” He responds tersely.

“It’s a gay bar.” I say, not really sure why it’s bothering me.

“Again, so? I went to see the DJ, he’s a friend of mine.” He asks.

“Oh.” I say resigned.

We ride in silence for awhile.

“Was it fun?” I ask.

“Feathers?” He asks.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah, it was fun. I hung out with some friends, had some drinks and went home.” He states.

“You’re giving me way too many details.” I say flippantly.

“What do you want to know, Dean?” He demands.

“Nothing. Forget it.” I say dropping the subject.

“Consider it forgotten.” And with that his eyes close until we get there.

************************************************************************

The next night he makes good on his promise for dinner. We head to Rick’s in Clifton. It’s a sports bar, but the food is really good. We have a great time just talking and drinking. After dinner McQueen drops me off and I invite him in for another beer. It’s the first time he’s been to my home and I’m actually nervous. I never bring anyone here and Mrs. Harper makes that obvious when she meets us in the hall inquiring about my friend.

I live in a two family house where I rent the second floor apartment from Mrs. Harper, an elderly widow. She gives me a break on the rent because she likes having a cop upstairs. She says it makes her feel safe.

“Who’s this, Craig?” She greets us.

“This is John Paul McQueen. We work together”

“This is Mrs. Harper. The woman who has stolen my heart.” I kid her.

“Oh you big tease.” She says. “Nice to meet you, John Paul.” She welcomes him graciously and gives me a covert wink. What’s with all the winking these days?

“Nice to meet you too.” McQueen returns kissing her hand.

“Well Mrs. Harper, good night. We were just heading upstairs for a drink before calling it a night.” I tell her pushing McQueen up the stairs ahead of me.

“You boys have fun.” She calls after us. “Not too loud though. I need my beauty rest.” She says.

“You don’t need that, you are too beautiful already.” I tease her from the stairs.

“Oh you.” She says and heads back into her apartment.

I manage to get the door unlocked even though my hands are fumbling from the proximity of McQueen on the small landing. I grab two beers out of the kitchen and settle on the couch next to McQueen. I flick through the channels and put on SportsCenter. We kind of just sit and watch it in silence for a few minutes. Things seem to have gotten a bit strained between us. I glance over at him sitting there drinking his beer and staring at the TV. His eyes are so beautifully blue. Where did that come from?

 **McQueen**

We head back to Dean’s place after dinner. He surprisingly invites me in for a beer and I accept. It sounds like a plan just continuing the conversation from dinner. I’m sitting on the couch. It’s a nice place. Not too big, not too small. It’s warm and comfortable. But I still feel tense. I’ve spent hour after hour, day after day with him. We even just had a great time at dinner, but I just feel weird. His landlady is adorable and it’s so typical the way he flirts with her just like the waitress at the diner. It just makes me like him a little bit more.

I’m about to get up and make my excuse to go, but then I feel him looking at me. I turn to look back and he looks away. So I drink him in, those beautiful brown eyes focusing on the TV. Where did that come from? I can’t help myself now and inch closer to him on the couch. My chest feels really tight for some weird reason.

 **Dean**

I slump down a bit on the couch sliding a little closer to McQueen. I’m not sure what I’m feeling. My chest tightens and I realize a feeling I’ve never felt before. Time slows down as I turn to look at him again and find that he’s looking at me. I edge slowly over to him and he’s edging closer to me too.

We finally meet in the middle. His hand comes up to my face stroking my cheek while my hand grips the back of his neck. Our lips meet gently, tentatively. I feel his tongue brush over my lip and my mouth opens to invite him in. His tongue slides in and duels with mine. We struggle for dominance over the kiss. His hands slide down to my waist pulling me in closer as my hands tangle in his hair.

The gentleness is gone as the kiss deepens and a groan echoes around the room.

 **McQueen**

I’m staring at Dean. I just never really took in how gorgeous he really is. That tousled brown hair and chocolate eyes, the little beauty mark over his lip is making my mouth water. Fuck!

Dean turns to look at me and instinctively I lift my hand up to stroke his face. Time slows down as his hand comes around and grasps the back of my neck drawing me in. Our lips touch softly at first and I can’t help myself when my tongue brushes over his lips asking for an invite in. Our tongues battle in the heat of our mouths and I feel his hands slide down to my waist.

The kiss becomes more ferocious and a groan reverberates about the room.

The noise startles me. I’m not sure which one of us groaned, but I know I have to get out of here. I can’t do this. It’s just not right. We work together. I’m going to have to see him every day at work. A thousand things flit through my mind, but the main theme is I have to leave immediately. I pull away from him, from his lips, from his arms. And stumble to the door. I mumble a quick apology and practically run away from him and down the stairs and into the night.

 **Dean**

The groan shocks me and I feel McQueen pull away. My mind races with reasons why this is such a bad idea. First and foremost is the fact that we work together. That could be awkward. McQueen offers a weak excuse as he races from my apartment and into the night. Yeah, things are definitely going to be awkward.


	11. Chapter 11

**Dean**

I sigh as I go to move off the couch. I make my way downstairs to check that the front door is locked securely. I stick my head outside and note that McQueen’s car is no where to be seen. I slowly make my way back upstairs and sit down on the couch numb from the rejection? No, I find that I’m relieved that he left so quickly. It’s not that I didn’t want to kiss him. At that moment in time, it was the one thing I wanted most in the world. But the implication of it all is just too much to think about.

I flick on a movie channel just for something to distract me. My fingers touch my lips that still feel the tingle from his mouth over mine. I try not to think about how his hand caressed my face or my hand on the back of his neck stroking his soft hair at the nape. I try not to think of the feel of his arms around me or the fluttering of my heart. But it’s impossible.

I try to concentrate on the movie in front of me, but the explosions and car chases aren’t bright enough to erase his face from my mind.

 **McQueen**

Shit! I run out of Dean’s house and drive home in record time. I’m a complete mess. This doesn’t happen to me. I get into my apartment and hide under the covers in bed as quickly as I can. I’m shaking like a leaf. What the hell did I just do? I think I’ve ruined everything.

My fingers ghost over my lips that are still stinging from our kiss. I’d blame it all on Dean, but I ran my tongue over his lips. At that moment in time, all I could think about was claiming his mouth. I never wanted to kiss anyone as desperately as I kissed him tonight. I try not to think about the way his skin felt under my touch and the slenderness of his waist. Fuck! I have totally screwed this friendship up.

I grab my iPod and stick the buds in my ears hoping to drown out my thoughts, but I can’t make the music loud enough.

********************************************************************

 **Dean**

To say the next morning was awkward would have been a complete understatement. I find him listening to one of Tommy’s more gruesome stories barely nodding as he takes it in. McQueen can’t even look at me when I enter the room and just grunts a greeting in my general direction. Tommy glances at me and raises his eyebrows questioningly and I shrug back.

A few minutes later, without saying a word, we slide into the squad car. I look at him and he looks like crap, like he hasn’t slept all night, although I probably look the same. I found myself drooling on the couch around 3:00 AM not remembering falling asleep in the first place and the rest of the night was spent tossing and turning trying not to think of his soft kissable lips.

I blame Tommy for putting these thoughts in my head. But I know he’s not the one making me feel this way. The only person to blame is me. But he kissed me too. Wait a second, he kissed me too. This wasn’t all me. What does that mean? What is he thinking about?

I look over at him, but he’s slumped down in the seat with his eyes closed cutting me off completely. He looks like he barely slept last night. Did the kiss really bother him that much? People kiss all the time and it doesn’t have to mean anything. Well, even I know that’s not true, but I could pretend it meant nothing and we can go back to the way things were.

 **McQueen**

Seeing Dean the next morning, he nods in my direction and I grunt a greeting back. I don’t have the energy for anything else. I haven’t said anything to anyone and just nod at Tommy when he tells me the story of the first suicide he worked. I’d vomit from his vivid description, but I haven’t even been able to eat anything to vomit up.

I spent most of the night with thoughts of him running through my head. I tried to analyze our friendship. What happened between us? Was it a mistake? Did I really want to go there with him? I’m not sure what these feelings are. I’ve never felt like this before. I’m not a blushing virgin, but the desperation I felt when we kissed was like nothing I ever felt before.

I blame Jacqui for putting these thoughts into my head. But I can’t really blame her can I? She was just pointing out what I was thinking all along. I blame myself for kissing him. But he kissed me back. Hold on, he kissed me back. What’s that all about? What the hell is he thinking right now?

I open my eyes to look over at Dean, but he’s driving with his sunglasses on and paying no attention to me. I take a moment to study his profile. He does have the longest eyelashes I’ve ever seen on a guy before. And the pout of his lips just makes me want to attack him, but I can’t. I mean it was just one kiss. No big deal. Who am I kidding? It was totally a big deal. But he doesn’t need to know that.

Finally breaking the silence between us, I speak up. “About last night…”

“Yeah.” He responds glancing quickly at me.

“I think we should forget about it. We’d been drinking and it just happened. I don’t want to ruin things between us over one little kiss.” I explain quickly.

 **Dean**

I release the breath I didn’t realize I was holding. He wants to forget it. Okay, that’s what I was planning anyway. “Okay, yeah. Whatever.” Is what I say agreeing to the total load of crap he just spewed at me. It’s a relief though. I just hope we can get our friendship back on track.

Thankfully, the day proves to be a bit busier than usual as call after call comes over the radio and we’re basically on the run all day long, then holed up in the office at the station for follow up and report writing. Usually I hate working too hard, but I’m thankful for the distraction and McQueen is a big help with the paperwork.


	12. Chapter 12

**McQueen**

Things went pretty well after we agreed to forget the kiss. Who the hell am I kidding? Things are as tense as ever. Where we used to be able to joke and talk about things, now there’s an underlying chasm that we just can’t seem to bridge. We mainly talk about work. God, could there be a more boring subject? We used to talk about going out for drinks after work or doing other things that friends would do together, but now we work and go our separate ways.

I miss my friend.

I can’t think of him being with anyone else. I don’t even want to be with anyone else, which is completely not like me. But no one else even compares.

I roll into work and check my mailbox noticing a memo dated this morning that has me working dispatch today. They sure do like to wait until the last moment.

I pass the notice to Dean who just shrugs and tells me he’ll see me later. Frick, I don’t want to spend the next eight hours without him.

 **Dean**

I’d like to be able to say that things are back to normal between McQueen and I, but that would be a total load of bullshit. Things are stressed. Our friendship is like a rubber band about to snap. I don’t think we could stretch any farther away from each other without doing irreparable damage. Sure we share a car for eight hours a day, but we don’t share anything else. I find myself going to work and then straight home everyday. I haven’t even gone to the rec center to work out either.

I miss my friend.

I haven’t been able to think straight since that night. My thoughts are consumed by him, but I don’t want them to be. I’d like to move on, but no one measures up to him.

I punch in for my shift when McQueen shows me a memo saying he has to work the desk today. I just shrug and say good bye, but shit, I’m going to miss him.

I head to the car with a sense of loneliness that I don’t remember ever feeling before. It’s going to be a long day.

 **McQueen**

So I sit at the dispatch desk with Hess, at least until Dee comes in at 9:00. I’m so bored. Hess doesn’t bother telling me what anything is, so I just sit and spin around in the chair until I’m dizzy. The guys say good bye on their way out the door until it’s just Hess and I. He tells me to look sharp that the chief and the rest of the brass should be in soon, but I just let out a loud sigh and flick through the channels on the TV. Nothing but crap or Good Morning America at this time of the day.

 **Dean**

I drive aimlessly around my area. I’m not even looking for anything out of the ordinary. I just want to keep busy, so my mind won’t wander. I crank up the radio on some crap dance station, but it drowns out some of the chatter going on in my mind. I find myself in Cherry Hill Park staring at the skyline. The sun rose a few hours ago, but I still sit and take in the beauty of the newly blooming flowers and trees. And I feel so lonely, surrounded by all this beauty.

 **McQueen**

Thank God Dee comes in. She’s always such a crackup. She has a comment about everybody and knows all the good gossip. Hess heads to the office and Dee takes me through a tour of the desk. She has everything neatly labeled and filed and laminated. She shows me the 911 info and the flip chart in case of emergency. She shows me the drawer where the take out menus are and how to use the radios and log a call.

Then she proceeds to give me the information on everyone who works in the department. Who’s sleeping with who. Who’s married and still sleeping with who. I listen in rapt attention as she describes how the range is where most of the guys take their dates for some alone time, but the only way to disarm the alarm is to call the desk, so being discreet is not an option around here. It’s a small town, so the rumor mill cranks faster here than most other places.

She proceeds to show me the map on how the town is divided into the sectors and the list showing which car covers which sector. The calls come through one after another and we’re fairly busy on the desk. Nothing too nerve wracking, but we manage to get everything handled in a timely manner.

We talk about Dean too. She sheds some light on that subject.

“Craig is a special one.” She tells me. “He has this hard exterior, but you can see he’s just a charming little marshmallow underneath it all.”

“Uh huh.” Is my nonverbal response.

“He’s only been here a little more than a year, but I can tell he’ll make some lady really lucky someday.” Dee says almost wistfully.

“Do you have a little crush on Officer Dean?” I tease her, but slowly break inside.

“Oh no.” She gasps. “I’ve got a man and he makes me happy.”

“Yes, Vandermede is a lucky guy.” I say sincerely. Dee is a little chatty and bold, but she’s got a heart of gold inside.

“415.” I call out.

“415.” Is the morose response I get back.

“Unwanted guest at 585 Falmouth.” I say.

“Male or female, got any details?” Dean sounds pissed now.

“Male by the name of George Cook. Homeowner will meet you out front.”

“On my way.”

“Received 14:45.”

 **Dean**

“415.” I was not prepared to hear his voice calling me over the radio. But really what was I expecting. He had been dispatching all morning, but just not for me.

I really have to shake out of this. Being alone is fucking with my mind and I’m determined to get my shit together. Maybe I should make some plans tonight after work. Eh, it can wait another day. I’ll try to round up some friends tomorrow.

I head over to Falmouth and when this Cook guy saw me, he agreed to leave. The homeowner chose not to pursue any charges, which saved me from having to write a report. I didn’t feel like going to the station to do it. I waste the next hour just driving aimlessly around and head in 15 minutes early. McQueen jumps up when I come in and drags me into the break room.

“This place is crazy.” He whispers to me.

“I know.” I whisper back.

“Come on, I need a drink.” He says grabbing my arm and steering me to the door.

“Whoa, slow down. I need to change first.” I say looking him up and down. “And so do you.”


	13. Chapter 13

**McQueen**

We head to the locker room to change. It’s a large room that had to be sectioned because of Sandy, the lone female officer. So we’re standing in a small section together. I take off my uniform, which is a pain due to all the equipment and I have to strap my weapon underneath my clothes because I can’t just leave it lying around. I’m pretty sure I’d get fired for something like that.

Dean is behind me doing the same thing and I try not to look. But I have to retrieve my shirt that I left on the bench behind me. I quickly glance at him and see him leaning over in just his boxers as he straps his pistol to a holster attached to his lower leg. I quickly turn away, something about Dean’s muscles as they ripple under his skin when he’s adjusting the holster is incredibly hot.

I straighten up and pull my t-shirt over my head adjusting the fit around my waist so the bulge of the pistol doesn’t show.

 **Dean**

I turn around to grab the shirt I left on the bench and get lost in the sight of McQueen pulling his shirt down. He’s in his boxers and the muscles of his back are taut and oh my God those hamstrings are just… let’s not go there right now. I turn around because McQueen sighs suddenly and I don’t want him to know I was ogling him in the locker room.

We finally get done and the tension is palpable.

“You ready?” He asks stuffing the rest of his clothing in a bag.

“Yeah.” I reply picking up my bag.

We take our own cars to the bar, find a table and sit down for a drink.

Our conversation seems stilted. I really thought we were going to be able to do this, but neither of us seems capable of saying anything. So we sit in an uncomfortable silence.

************************************************************************

After awhile this girl approaches us at our table. She nods over to her friend who is sitting nearby. “My friend and I were wondering if you guys wanted to join us.”

“Uh, no thanks.” McQueen says briefly glancing at the girl at the table. I look at him questioningly, but he’s avoiding looking at me.

“All right, well we’re right over there if you change your mind.” She says pointing to the table as she backs away.

“Hey, what did you do that for?” I ask.

“I don’t feel like chatting with some strange girls.” He replies.

“Well what if I did?” I complain.

“Then go.” He says.

“What?” I ask stunned and a little hurt to be dismissed.

“I said, go ahead.” He challenges.

“B-but…” I stutter.

“What is it? Do you want to go talk to some strange girls right now or would you rather be talking to me?” He dares me.

“Uh…” I’m at a loss for words.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. But if you want to go over, I can’t stop you.” He says.

“Whatever. Maybe I should go over. It’s not like you’re talking to me.” I reply sounding like a jealous wife.

“What does that mean?” He asks narrowing his eyes at me.

“Duh, I mean we’ve been here for awhile now sitting in complete silence. I thought you wanted to hang out with me, but you haven’t said two words to me.” I explode out all at once.

He looks like he’s mulling it over and finally came to a decision about something. “I’m sorry.” He says softly. “I really don’t know how to do this.”

“Do what?” I ask my heart pounding in my chest.

“This!” He says loudly gesturing between us. “I don’t know how to get back to before.”

“Why do you want to get back?” I whisper.

 **McQueen**

He asks me why I want to go back, and I think for a moment, but just go with my feelings. “Because it was good before. But this is just… not good.” I say as uneloquently as I can.

Dean looks hurt. I don’t want him to be hurt. I want him to be the way he was before. “I feel like I’m walking on eggshells all the time. Constantly being vigil about what I can and cannot say.” I take a deep breath. “It was easy before. Everything flowed. I could talk to you about anything, but this… this just sucks.”

I hurt him. I can tell by the look on his face. But it needed to be said. There’s this huge distance between us. He takes a deep breath seeming like he’s trying to keep it together. And then he smiles sadly. “I know.” He says quietly. “And I wish we could go back, but I don’t know how.”

“We’ll have to figure it out somehow.” I plead with him.

“What if I don’t want to go back?” He asks.

 **Dean**

“Wh-what… why?” McQueen asks hurt etched through his features.

“Well, for one thing I’d have to admit that the kiss never happened. And I don’t want that. That kiss we shared was so… wow… I can’t admit that never happened. It did and we have to deal with it.” I say adamantly.

“Oh-kay.” He says.

“That night, when we kissed, I never wanted to kiss anyone as much as I wanted to kiss you in that moment. And if you can’t deal with that, then maybe you should leave.” I say.

“I – I…” He stutters flustered by the ultimatum.

“I’m willing to be your friend. But you have completely closed yourself off from me and I don’t know why. I missed you today. I can admit that. I hated being out on the road alone.” I say lamenting the crappy day I had.

 **McQueen**

“I feel the same way.” I manage to whisper to Dean. “I missed you today. Being behind that desk all day completely sucked. Dee is nice, but she’s not you.” I say lamely. “And… I wanted that kiss too,” I say glancing over my shoulder without meeting his eyes, “More than I should have.” I rub my hands over my face. “I want to… to be your friend. I want that more than anything. I’m just… I’m not really good at this. I’ve had friends before, but none like you.”

“Yeah… yeah, me too.” Dean says smiling at me. I smile back.

“Yeah. Maybe we should try talking more.” And then I laugh. It feels so good to laugh again. To just feel again feels good. And then Dean is laughing. I feel a huge weight has been lifted off of me and down the rest of my beer before getting the next round in.

************************************************************************

I feel more normal than I have in awhile and I join Dean at the table again sliding a draft down in front of him as I sit. “I got the Kings of Leon tickets the other day. You still want to go?”

“Of course.” He replies.

“Good.” I say smiling again.

We spend the rest of the evening chatting like the friends that we are. Things seem to have gotten somewhat on track. We stay off the subjects of dating, men and women. I tell him all the gossip that Dee imparted to me today. He doesn’t seem surprised by any of it.

At the end of the night, we part and go our separate ways.


	14. Chapter 14

**McQueen**

We’re on patrol again. I’m back in the passenger seat stealing sips of Dean’s drink every time he turns his head. I can’t stop looking at him and it’s not exactly because I’m afraid he’s going to catch me. His lips are pursed almost to the point of pouting and his eyelashes are something from a beauty ad. I watch his Adam’s apple bob as he takes a sip out of the bottle noticing that it’s almost empty.

“Fuck McQueen, stop drinking my soda!” He shouts at me.

“What? I’m thirsty.” I defend myself.

“Get your own.” He demands.

“But yours tastes so much better.” I tease him.

“Fuck off.” Is the terse response.

“Come on, it’s just some soda.” I reply smiling sweetly at him.

“Like fuck it is.” He retorts.

“You’ll let me put my tongue in your mouth, but you won’t share your soda.” I ask him trying to embarrass him.

“That’s not it. Don’t be an asshole. It’s not the fact that you’re drinking it. It’s that you’ve drank all of it.” He says not rising to the bait.

“Fine, I’ll buy you another one. Stop at the store.” I offer.

“Forget it.” He says pissed off.

“No, no. I drank all your soda. Let me buy you another one.” I say making amends.

“You didn’t drink all of it.” He placates me.

“Good God, man, make up your mind.” I say tired of his back and forth.

“Whatever.” Is the intelligent reply.

“Ah, that old gem of a response. Did you ever notice you say that a lot?” I ask him.

“What?” He inquires.

“No, whatever. You say it way too much.” I complain.

“Okay.” Is the retort.

“Come on, Dean, you can do better than that.” I criticize.

“Yeah?” He says not wavering from the one word responses.

“You’re hilarious.” I say and then travel into a stream of consciousness. “Did you ever wonder if Darth Vader was really as badass as he seemed or was he just being controlled? I mean he had to do certain things in order to keep himself alive. So was he really such a bastard and wanted to do all those things or was he just coerced under duress to perform these acts? See this is what I think about.”

 **Dean**

“No, never wondered.” I respond questioning where all this came from.

“It’s like, is a person inherently bad so they perform bad acts or are people actually inherently good, like Anne Frank thought, and just forced to perform bad acts? Where does freedom of choice disappear and how bad does an act have to be to where you just can’t live with yourself anymore?” He asks so quickly that I can’t even wrap my head around the words.

“Oh my God, shut up!” I shout at him.

“What?” He asks stunned by my outburst.

“You haven’t stopped talking for like five minutes.” I explain.

“Oh yeah, forgot to mention, soda does that to me. The combination of the sugar and caffeine totally hypes me up.” He clarifies.

“Oh goody.” I say sarcastically.

“Yeah, it’s really weird because coffee doesn’t have the same effect, only soda. When I was little I wasn’t allowed to drink soda. My mother said it was because it would rot my teeth, but I suspect it’s because of the hyperactive state it puts me in.” He enlightens me.

“Uh, huh. You don’t say.” Is the only thing I can think of to say.

“So anyway, I was thinking of joining a gym, but I’m not sure which one would be right for me. I’m starting to get flabby. I was totally in shape after the academy, but all this sitting around in the car is making me flab out. I should probably go jogging, but I wanted to put on a little muscle instead of just doing cardio.” He says quickly. Did he really say he was getting flabby? From what I saw the other day, he looks great and nicely muscled too. Shit, why is my mind going there?

“Maybe…” I try to interrupt.

“I also need to find a place to live. My lease is up in two months and I don’t think I can take living in those apartments anymore. It’s so overcrowded. There’s never any parking, plus I want a yard. You’d think the noise level would bother me, but growing up with all those sisters makes it possible to sleep through anything. And…”

“McQueen, shut up!” I shout again.

“Sorry, was I rambling? I didn’t mean to. It’s just…” He starts again.

“Shhhhh.” I start laughing.

“Okay.” He agrees.

“How can we get this to stop? Is there, like, a counter-agent to it?” I ask intrigued by this bizarre affliction.

“Uh, maybe something salty. I could go for some pretzels or something. Let’s go to Quick Check.” He suggests.

“And water.” I add on.

“Yes and water.” He allows.

************************************************************************

“All better now?” I ask him after he’s had his snack.

“Yeah. I think so.” He says groggily.

“You sound tired.” I say.

“Yeah, the downside to the high. Twenty minute nap ought to cure it.” He responds as his eyes slowly close.

“Okay. Take it easy, I’ll wake you if anything good happens.” I reassure him as he drifts off to sleep. God, he looks so relaxed when he’s asleep. Those golden eyelashes just fanned across his cheek and the soft shape of his mouth and… oh crap, there I go again. Eyes on the road, Dean.


	15. Chapter 15

**Dean**

His hand carefully tucks a stray hair behind my ear, then comes around and caresses my cheek. Insistent lips cover my own with a tongue that demands entrance to my mouth. His hand slides down my chest and over my abs leaving a hot trail of sparks in its wake. The hand reaches my rock hard cock and lightly strokes over it before heading to my balls. The tongue is slowly caressing mine gently yet persistently, then his hand wraps around my cock and strokes slow at first then gaining speed. My hips buck up into his hand until I am no longer in control and my moans reach a fever pitch. My orgasm rushes through me shooting hot streams of semen over my stomach.

 **McQueen**

His body hovers over mine, teasing me with nips and licks down my neck, over my nipples, licking my abs. His hands tease the inside of my thighs, up over the vee of my pelvis and brush over my already hard cock. His tongue slowly lowers and his mouth engulfs my balls sucking gently at my sac. I can barely contain myself until finally his tongue licks up my hardened shaft, circling the head and taking my length in one swift move. I buck my hips off the bed pushing into the hot heat gasping for breath. He gains speed while holding my hips down on the bed and sucking me until I scream from the orgasm that is ripped from my body.

 **Dean**

I wake up slowly groaning from the stickiness of my boxers. I look around for McQueen. I could swear he was here. I’m almost convinced that it wasn’t a dream. But I’m alone. I peel myself out of bed and into the shower.

 **McQueen**

I open my eyes gradually and glance over to the other side of the bed certain that Dean would be laying there. My wet shorts are an indication that it was all just a dream. I sigh and then haul my ass out of bed and into the shower.

************************************************************************

 **McQueen**

I stumble into work, head still foggy with sleep the shower couldn’t erase. I pour myself a cup of coffee and wait for Dean to arrive.

I can’t believe I had that dream about him. I’m so embarrassed that I actually blush when I see him once he finally gets in. That certainly doesn’t stop me from watching him all day. Especially his mouth. Is his mouth really capable of giving that much pleasure? I think he notices me watching because he keeps shooting me these weird looks, but whatever.

I need to think about something else, so I switch to the Kings of Leon concert, which is tonight. I’m so excited! I’m jumping out of my skin. This is going to be awesome! I think I drive Dean a little bit crazy today with my excitement.

 **Dean**

I’m running late for work… again. I just don’t know why I can’t get my ass in gear. I get in to find that someone has punched me in already. I ask McQueen and he just shrugs. “You can get in trouble for doing something like that.” He remarks.

Oh my god, I can barely look at him, that dream was so hot yet embarrassing. It’s totally distracting me today. I keep sneaking peeks at him. I can’t keep my eyes off those hands that gave me so much bliss.

I try to change the subject in my overactive imagination. It’s finally the night. We’re going to see Kings of Leon. McQueen has been going on and on all day about it. It’s nice to see him so excited, but I sure wish he’d shut up.

I turn to see blue eyes looking at me expectantly. “What?” I ask looking away.

“I asked you a question.” He says glaring at me.

“What was it?” I ask not taking my eyes off the road.

“The question was: are you excited about tonight? But the new question is: where were you just now?” He inquires with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh, um… I was thinking about this weird dream I had last night.” I tell him honestly.

“Oh.” Is all he says looking a little flushed.

“It was kind of… disturbing, but in a good way.” I elaborate a little bit.

“What was it about?” He prods for details.

“Oh, um… I don’t really want to talk about it.” I says evasively looking away from him.

“You brought it up.” He mutters.

“But you asked.” I reply.

“You could have lied.” He says nonchalantly.

“I don’t lie.” I say adamantly.

“Pht.” He spits.

“Did you just pht me?” I ask astonished.

“Yes, pht. You’re lying when you say you don’t lie.” He flippantly replies.

“I don’t.” I say.

“Yeah, okay. You keep telling yourself that.” He lets it go.

“What does that mean?” I ask kind of weirded out by where this conversation has gone.

“Nothing, getting back to the question. So you excited about tonight?” He asks eyes shining brightly.

“Yeah, yeah. Can’t wait.” I say with as much enthusiasm as I can muster under the circumstances.

“Oooh, curb your enthusiasm. You might just pull something.” He says sarcastically.

“No, I am. It should be great.” I say with sincere excitement.

“Good.”

************************************************************************

We find our seats, on the floor. On the floor, man!

“This is gonna be wild!” McQueen exclaims. I turn to him grinning like the fool that I am. We settle into our seats and fall into some chitchat to waste the time before the show starts. It’s absolutely crazy as the arena fills up and we look around at all the faces. We point to the upper tier and laugh at the losers who sit up there. We have a perfect view of the stage from our vantage point and they’re stuck in the nosebleed section.

Finally, the lights lower and there they are. Kings of Leon. Their presence is overwhelming and the crowd gets to its feet to welcome them.

The music is loud and the crowd is pumped. We’re crushed in a mass of sweating, undulating bodies. I’m pushed up behind a really hot girl with McQueen at my back. We’re going wild screaming and singing along with Caleb. I wasn’t expecting to have such a good time.

 **McQueen**

Oh my God, this place is crazy. The music is loud and completely rocking. The crowd is rowdy. I have some girl gyrating up against my back pushing me into Dean, not that I’m complaining about that. This is exactly where I want to be. I feel my cock harden from the friction of Dean’s ass. I would like nothing more than to bend him over and fuck him right here. But I can’t go there. Not with him.

I turn around to face the girl behind me. She really is hot. Blonde hair, blue eyes, nice little body.

 **Dean**

I feel the loss of McQueen when he turns away. I look over my shoulder and see that he has given his attention to a cute blonde. Well fuck him if he wants to be with her. Even though that’s what I want to be doing.

The brunet with the long hair and pert round ass in front of me is rubbing her lithe body against mine, but McQueen was the one making me lose control. The brunet turns around to face me and grins. I give her a shy smile back. Then she throws her arms around me and begins to swivel her hips pressing up against me.

 **McQueen**

The blonde throws her arms around my neck and pushes her breasts against my chest. She’s so subtle. She’s not exactly what I want, but she’ll have to do for now.

The tunes are cranking, the crowd is jumping. This chick is all over me and I’m enjoying it, but I’d rather Dean was all over me. I look over to see Dean with this girl draped all over him and I can’t describe the feeling I get, but I want that. I want to be all over Dean.

 **Dean**

I see McQueen with the blonde pressed up against him and as much as I don’t want to admit it, I wish it was me.

************************************************************************

When the encore ends and the lights come up, I blink at the sudden brightness and turn to John Paul, but the brunet grabs my arm and tries to kiss me. I pull back, “Listen, you’re a really great dancer and I had fun tonight, but that’s all there is to it.”

 **John Paul**

The blonde grabs my hand and tries to pull me out of the row of seats. I turn to Craig for some help, but he is currently talking to the brunet. I can’t hear what they’re saying. So I pull my hand from the blonde’s grasp. “This isn’t happening tonight. I need to wait for my friend.” I say gently turning to go back to my seat.

She gives me a sad look as her friend takes her elbow and steers her out of there. I sit back down in the seat I abandoned hours ago and wait for Craig to finish.

“So call me.” The brunet says shoving a slip of paper into Craig’s hand.

“Yeah, whatever.” He responds. I don’t think I’ve ever been happier to hear that word in my life. He flops down into the seat next to mine and throws the paper on the floor. He turns to me and exclaims, “That was awesome! I don’t think I’ve ever danced that much in my life.”

“Yeah, me too.” I agree smiling at his enthusiasm. “Let’s get out of here.” I suggest pulling him out into the throng of exiting concertgoers.

We make it to the car and thankfully the lots have emptied quite a bit in the last half hour.

“Why did you throw away that girl’s number?” I ask him once we’re on the highway headed home.

“What?” He asks puzzled.

“You know, the phone number?” I prompt him.

“Oh, I wasn’t gonna call her. She’s not what I’m looking for, so why bother taking the number home?” He reasons.

“She was really hot though.” I protest.

“Yeah, but I’m not looking for just hot, I want some substance there too.” He says in explanation.

“Oh.” Is my incredibly stupid response.

“What about the blonde?” He counters.

“Ha, ha. She wanted me to go hang out with her and her friends, but I told her I was waiting for you.” I explain.

“She seemed nice.” He says with a chuckle.

“Oh yeah, real nice.” I say in the most smarmy way possible. “But the same problem, all surface, no substance. She reminded me a bit of Carmel though.”

We get back to my building, but before I get out, the words just sort of tumble from my mouth without my brain thinking it over first. “Listen, I’m like all wired, you want to come in and play some Madden ’09?” I blurt and then mentally clap a hand over my mouth.

 **Craig**

“Um, yeah.” I agree and then find a place to park and follow him in. John Paul’s place is small, but it’s very him. Just the essentials, you know, TV, sound system, video games, but with lots of photos everywhere.

He gets the game set up and I play as the Giants and he plays as the Jets. John Paul thrashes me soundly ending up with a score of 42 – 14.

“In your face!” He shouts and gets up to do a victory dance, which has me admiring his ass in a very not so friend-like way.

We play the second game where I beat him completely. I jump up to do my victory dance, but when I turn around, his eyes are focused on my crotch where my ass was seconds before. He looks away flustered.

“Like what you see?” I challenge him expecting a flippant comment in return.

“Uh… um…” He seems flustered, but he gets that determined look on his face and looking straight up into my eyes. “Yeah.” Is the single breathy syllable that comes out of his mouth.

I gulp and stare down at him, lost in the bluest eyes. Suddenly he is on his feet inches away from me.

 **John Paul**

This is it. I’m staring into Craig Dean’s eyes and it just feels right. This is the substance that the others have lacked. I reach up and grip his face in my hands. I bring my lips to his crushing them together. It takes a few seconds before he responds and his hands grip onto my waist. I feel his tongue brush against my lips looking for entrance, sorry, more like demanding entrance. I open my mouth and our tongues clash. The kiss deepens and lengthens…


	16. Chapter 16

**Craig**

John Paul is kissing me… again!

His hands move down to my arms stroking my biceps through my shirt as our tongues spar together in the heat of our mouths. I reach up and stroke his face then lower them down to unbutton his shirt as he does the same for me. Breaking off the kiss, I pull his shirt over his shoulders and down his arms tossing it away. I pull my shirt off and throw it afar as well. We are standing chest to chest. I suck briefly on his shoulder when he attacks my neck leaving me breathless and completely out of control moaning loudly in the quiet room. Hands roam fast and furious over flushed skin. I can’t touch him enough. His skin is soft and silky, not what I was expecting. I trace the curves of his back just enjoying the feel of him.

 **John Paul**

I slowly walk Craig into the bedroom and push him lightly onto the bed. This is where he should have been all along. I can be such an idiot sometimes. I start at the bottom and remove his shoes and socks working my way up to unbuckle his belt. Fumbling for a moment at the button on his jeans and finally working the zip out of the way, I strip him bare in front of me. He is gorgeous. My eyes feast on his body taking in the lines of his muscles and the trail of hair leading to his large hard cock.

I lie down next to him caressing his face as I claim his lips and mouth for my own. He wraps his arms around me, but then I break the kiss and start on his neck sucking the sensitive flesh as he writhes and shivers under my ministrations. Straddling him with my clothes still on, he quickly moves to unbuckle my belt. Unfortunately, I have to get off of him in order to remove my jeans. He let’s out a loud sigh when I remove my weight like he’s finally gaining his control back.

But once I kick my jeans across the floor, I am back on him in a flash. I crawl up between his legs causing them to fall wantonly apart and continue to lick and suck my way down from his neck to his now hard and aching cock.

“John Paul.” He whispers. I respond with a raised eyebrow.

“Please.” He implores. And as much as I love to hear him beg, I know what I want to do. Bypassing his prick and heading for his low hanging balls I tongue bathe them and I can feel the goosebumps that appear on his thighs. I take a nip at his inner thigh causing a low guttural moan to escape from his mouth.

“Please, John Paul.” He whispers again. Moving my tongue up his hardened shaft and over the leaking head, I take his length in one quick movement causing Craig to lift his hips off the bed. This reaction spurs me to increase the speed and suction applied to his cock. Craig is currently squirming beneath me, his panting breaths have sped up to a crescendo and he let’s out a loud “Ohhhhhhhhhhhh!” When he cums in my mouth.

Releasing his cock, I slide up the bed next to him watching the look of absolute pleasure and relaxation that has come over his face. The rise and fall of his chest evens out as he gains his breath back. His brown eyes open and he gets this predatory look in them.

 **Craig**

Fuck is the only thing I think after cumming so hard and so fast into John Paul’s mouth. I’ve never felt like that before. It was, for lack of better words, completely amazing. And now he’s lying next to me completely naked and as hard as granite. He’s looking at me just watching my reaction and for some reason I find that so hot. I push him onto his back startling him, but he recovers quickly.

I seek out his lips with mine swirling my tongue into his mouth and tasting the remnants of my orgasm there, which, again, is just so hot. I break off the kiss leaving him gasping for air and move slowly down his neck suckling, nibbling and licking my way down across his shoulder, his nipples until I end up at the trail of hair below his bellybutton.

Running my hands up his thighs, tickling the junction of inner thigh and his testicles, I dip my tongue into his navel eliciting a moan of epic proportions.

“Craig…” is the plaintive moan echoing around the otherwise silent room.

I just look up at him and his eyes are pleading with me. Who am I to resist John Paul’s charms?

Lowering my head again, I take his hard shaft in my mouth rotating my tongue around the head before sucking the entire length in. He practically shoots up off the bed from the sudden heat. But then I just stop. I hold his hips down, but don’t move my head.

“Craaaaaaaaig… please.” He whines. I’m enjoying the power, I count to five in my head before pulling my head up and sucking. John Paul begins panting and moaning under my touch. I run my hands up his inner thigh stroking his balls until his breathing becomes erratic and he comes long and hard into my mouth. I swallow down every drop before moving to lie alongside him.

John Paul’s arm appears boneless as he reaches out for me. The look of sheer bliss on his face makes me feel wonderful inside and I snuggle into his side.


	17. Chapter 17

**Craig**

I stretch my arms and legs out feeling the strain from last night. Slowly blinking my eyes open, I remember EVERYTHING that happened. I smile at first and then sigh as I realize I’m alone in the bed. Rummaging through the clothes on the floor, I locate my boxers that were carelessly discarded last night then find a tee shirt in John Paul’s dresser.

I sigh again and leave the room to use the bathroom before trying to find John Paul. Washing my hands and face, I have thoughts of last night running through my mind. His lips on mine, his hands on my body, his tongue on my… Snap out of it, Craig! I mentally berate myself. I can’t go mooning after John Paul like a lovesick schoolgirl.

Last night was good. I mean really good. But what does it mean? Usually I’d be home by now. I don’t normally spend the night. But this feels different. I don’t want to leave.

I wander out of the bathroom and see John Paul sitting on the couch with a bowl of some kids’ cereal watching cartoons. Why am I not surprised? He’s like a big kid himself sometimes.

I go over and sit on the other end of the couch.

“G’morning.” He greets me around a mouthful of cereal.

“Morning.” I respond.

“You want some coffee?” He offers dipping the spoon back into the bowl.

“Sure. But I’ll go and get it.” I say staring at his mouth as he brings the spoon up towards it. He slowly opens up sliding the spoon past his pink smooth lips. What I wouldn’t give to be that spoon.

“You sure?” He asks and I nod my head slowly trying to get my thoughts back on track. “There’s a fresh pot in the kitchen and the mugs are in the cabinet above.” He finishes explaining.

“Okay.” I say as I head to the kitchen grateful for something to do. I’ve never been envious of a spoon before. I muss about, taking my time, thinking too much, getting my breathing under control.

I come to the conclusion that I don’t know how I feel about what happened last night and I don’t know what it means. Obviously, the concert was awesome, but being with John Paul was mind blowing.

 **John Paul**

I wake up before Craig this morning and seeing him lying naked in my bed is… just… amazing. I normally don’t like it when people stay over, but it just felt right to have him here. I watch him sleep for a bit. He looks so angelic, but I know that looks can be deceiving. The things he did with that mouth last night and those long slender fingers, oh my!

I make a pot of coffee and grab some cereal to eat in front of the TV while I wait for Craig to get up.

I don't have to wait long before I hear him moving around and getting washed up. He strolls out looking like sex on legs with his hair all mussed and those long legs striding over to sit next to me on the couch. Why is he sitting so far away?

He seems nervous or something, fidgety almost. I offer him coffee and he goes off to make it himself after giving me a weird look. I blow out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding. This is not going exactly the way I wanted it to.

After a long while, I've finished my breakfast and he comes back in and sits down again sipping his coffee. I just can't stop myself from staring at those lips as he blows across the surface of the hot liquid cooling it before taking a sip. I gulp. Oh my God. What is happening to me? I'm jealous of a cup of coffee.

Craig clears his throat and I shake my head to get it back into the present. I look into his soft brown eyes just trying to keep myself from jumping him.

 **Craig**

When I sit back down, John Paul is looking at me a little weird. What is he thinking? I clear my throat and he seems to shake out of it.

"John Paul." I start.

"Mm?" He answers dreamily.

"What's going on?" I ask without any build up, any explanation.

"Nothing really. I don't have any plans for today. You?" He answers completely misunderstanding the question.

"Oh, um, yeah. Me neither." I clumsily reply.

"You want to do something?" He asks looking at me expectantly with hope in his stunning blue eyes.

"Yeah... no... what I mean is... that's not what I meant." I manage to stutter completely lost in him.

"What?" He asks.

"No, I meant what happened last night?" I try to explain.

"If you don't know, Craig, I really can't help you." He says getting pissed off.

"No... no. I mean what does it mean?" I try again ineptly. He interprets the question anyway.

"It doesn't have to mean anything. It is what it is. We had a good time. Well at least I did." He says with hope in his eyes.

Crap, does he think I didn't have a good time? "No, no. I had a great time too." I reassure him.

"Okay, well we don't have to let it get between us. I mean we can still be friends." He says.

"But don't you want more?" I ask distressed by where this is going and rubbing the back of my neck.

"I don't know what I want. Do you?" John Paul poses the question back at me.

"No, I suppose I don't." I respond anxiously.

"We could just see where it goes." He muses.

"We could." I agree. "It doesn't have to destroy what we have does it?"

I don't know why I'm asking him these questions. He can't possibly have any more of a clue than I do about what's going to happen between us. I can't expect him to predict the future. I do know that he's the person I trust most in the world. I guess what happens happens. If for no other reason than I can't imagine my life without him.

 **John Paul**

Why is he asking me these questions? I don't know what any of this means. I know that I want to be his friend. I know that he makes me feel really good. I know I can tell him anything. I know that I can't lie to him and I trust him more than any other person.

"Of course not. I'm going to take a shower, you want to come?" I ask him as I stand up stretching my muscles and holding out my hand.

Craig bounces out of his seat grabbing my proffered hand and practically drags me to the bathroom.  
"A bit eager aren't we?" I ask, "Hey, is that my shirt?" I add as an afterthought.

Craig kicks the door shut behind us, then grabs my face eagerly plunging his tongue into my mouth. He takes my breath away as I can barely keep up with him. His hands grab my tee shirt and rip it straight up my body and tear it over my head. His lips make immediate contact with my nipples that contract and harden under his tongue. I gasp at the sensation that rockets through my body and straight to my groin making my cock jump ramrod hard.

He is not relenting at all and his hands make quick work of my boxers drawing them down my legs to pool around my ankles. Being caught up I can't move my legs and he snakes his arm past me in the small space to flick the water on. Craig falls to his knees and pulls me in close to him again nuzzling his face into my groin, his hot breath ghosts over my straining cock. He deftly caresses my ass as he licks the head of my cock and massages the opening of my ass pushing his finger slowly past the ring of muscle.

I am on fire now. Every sensation is running through my nerves on overload. I can’t help the uncontrollable moans that are issuing from my throat. His tongue, his fingers, the ministrations on my cock and ass are getting to be too much. He inserts a second and then a third finger stretching me until he hits that spot.

The fireworks are exploding in my head as my balls tighten up. I shout out his name as I shoot my load into the back of his throat. If he wasn't holding me up, my knees would have buckled and I'd have collapsed on top of him.

 **  
**Craig**   
**

I slide up his body and reach over into the tub to adjust the temperature. I pull John Paul into the tub under the spray. I turn him around to face the tile running my hands up and down his smooth, muscled back. I can’t keep my hands off him. I’m usually not so aggressive, but he just brings out the animal in me.

I lower my hands down and stroke his butt cheeks spreading him out in front of me watching the water dripping off his back and down his crack. My cock is aching, desperate to be inside him. I ease my cock slowly inside the puckered opening and it stretches to accommodate my girth. John Paul moans from the intrusion, but pushes back against me.

I nibble kisses down his back and grip his hips as I thrust further inside. “So tight… so hot.” I whisper barely heard over the running water that beats over us. I start to thrust into him and he pushes back meeting me stroke for stroke. I know when I’ve hit his prostate when he moans.

“Harder, faster.” John Paul demands between panting breaths. I reach around for his cock that is hard and caress him in time with my thrusts. I can feel him pushing his cock into my fist and he cums over the tile with a shuddering shake.

This spurs me on as I impale him harder and faster. The sensations are too overwhelming though. I close my eyes and push faster and faster losing the rhythm and the pace as my orgasm rushes through me. I shout out his name as I cum harder than I ever have before.


	18. Chapter 18

**Craig**

Things begin to heat up between John Paul and I after the Kings of Leon concert and I, for one, am not complaining. We’ve been seeing each other more and more after work as well as at work. I just never thought it would lead to this, dare I say, relationship.

We’re on evening shift now, 4:00 PM to midnight, cruising around town in the patrol car.

“415.” Comes Hess’ voice over the radio.

“415.” John Paul responds.

“We have a report of a multivehicle collision, Route 46 East between Boulevard and River.”

“Received.”

“Rescue 1 and Engine 1 are on their way.”

I put the lights on and John Paul hits the sirens. We speed through the backed up traffic until we can block off the road from approaching traffic. Rescue 1 and Engine 1 wend their way through the traffic, up the shoulder of the road screeching to a halt near us.

John Paul and I get out to check the scene before proceeding. It seems simple enough, three cars involved in a chain reaction rear end hit. But the middle vehicle is crunched up where the driver can’t get the door open and will need to be extricated.

The firefighters clamber out of the trucks and survey the damage deciding on the best course of action. The ambulance comes tearing down the road to assess the driver for injuries before they can take him out of the car.

John Paul and I take statements from the drivers of the other two vehicles determining the course of events. Apparently an unknown vehicle cut off the first driver causing him to brake hard and the second vehicle to hit him and then the third to hit the second. Pretty cut and dry.

We have enough info for the report and I head back to the cruiser to start typing it up. John Paul stands outside watching the fire crew cut the door off the car using the Jaws of Life. He’s chatting with the ambulance crew as they wait for the driver to be freed. Suddenly, he smiles and nods at one of the firefighters. My breath catches in my throat as I realize it’s Ben. When did they become so friendly?

I pop out of the car with the intention of getting the fire department report number and the ambulance run number, but curiosity gets the best of me. I sidle up next to John Paul and casually raise my elbow to lean on his shoulder. I check his line of sight and see that he’s watching the firefighters work. “Like what you see?” I ask him.

He glances at me, just a quick flick of the eyes, “I think it’s amazing the way they work so well together and handling the equipment.”

“Is that it?” I boldly ask.

“Yup, pretty much. You finish the report?” He asks.

I gulp, “Yeah, uh, almost done.”

“Well they’re almost done here. The scene should be clear soon.” I turn to find the chief for the report number.

“John Paul!” A voice shouts out. I turn back around.

“Ben.” I exclaim shocked that he’s calling John Paul.

Ben approaches where we’re standing slightly out of breath.

“Hey Ben, I’ve been meaning to call you.” John Paul says to him causing my eyebrows to shoot up in surprise.

“Yeah?” Ben says in response. “Hey Craig.” He greets me.

“Hey.” I say back completely baffled as to what’s going on.

“Yeah, you know, my friend, the DJ wants to get together with you.”

“Really?” Ben responds definitely interested.

“Yeah. He said you seemed pretty fun that night and thought he’d see if you want to hang out some time.” John Paul explains.

“Oh man, awesome. I don’t know, there’s just something about a DJ.” Ben says dreamily.

John Paul laughs, “Yeah, Spike said the same thing about firefighters.”

“That’s great. Call me with the details.” Ben orders.

I just stand there staring incredulously between them. My head is full of questions. I get lost in my thoughts when John Paul laughs at something Ben said, but I missed.

“Yeah, you should have seen the look on your face.” John Paul laughs again.

“That stuff was disgusting. I think I was still hammered when I drove you to work the next morning.” Ben utters.

“Oh my God, don’t remind me. I felt like shit all day. Craig had to drive me to pick up my car. I thought I was going to puke.” John Paul complains.

“What are you talking about?” I butt in at this point feeling left out of the conversation.

“Remember when you drove me to pick up my car?” John Paul prompts.

“Yeah, it was at Feathers. What does that have to do with you?” I ask Ben.

“Oh, I was at Feathers when I ran into John Paul there that night.” Ben clarifies.

“I was there to see my friend Spike, the DJ.” John Paul explains.

“You have a friend named Spike?” I pose.

“Yeah, so…” John Paul seems puzzled by the relevance of the question. “So Ben and I ran into each other at the bar, remembering when you introduced us. So we had some drinks.”

“Some drinks?” Ben interrupts. “It was like 10 too many drinks.”

“All right. So we got a little wasted. And Spike thought Ben was cute and wanted to formally meet him when we all weren’t so blitzed and Spike wasn’t working.”

“Oh-kay.” I say. “How did Ben end up driving you to work?” John Paul colors slightly at this question.

“Well, since I left my car there, Ben had to drive me.” He answers not really looking at me. But Ben is watching me for a reaction. I really don’t know what to think. It just doesn’t make any sense. Why would he call Ben to drive him to work? Ben doesn’t even live in that part of town.

My heart starts pounding as I realize what it means. John Paul didn’t call Ben. He didn’t have to. Ben was already at his apartment. The apartment where we…

“Craig, are you okay?” A voice asks. I turn to Ben who’s staring at me.

“Yeah.” I manage to mumble and nod, my knees almost buckling.

“You look really white.” He says gripping my elbow to keep me on my feet.

“I… I need to sit down. I feel kind of weird.” I stutter out and John Paul grabs my other elbow and they walk me back to the car. They get me settled in the passenger seat.

“Thanks, Ben.” John Paul says. “I’ll call you later.”

John Paul thrusts a bottle of water into my hands. “Drink this.” He instructs. I shakingly manage to get the bottle open and gulp down a few mouthfuls. “Are you all right?” He asks with concern in his voice. He’s crouched down outside the car and puts his hand on my knee. I shake his hand off and he looks at me a little hurt.

“Did you sleep with him?” I hiss between clenched teeth.

“Who?” He responds with confusion.

“Kris Kringle. Who do you think?” I sarcastically reply while rolling my eyes.

John Paul stands up suddenly shifting his weight from foot to foot. “Ben? Well, I…” He trails off eyes darting nervously around.

“It’s a simple yes or no question.” I sneer at him.

“Yes, I slept with Ben that night I met him at the bar. I was really drunk and I barely even remember it. It meant nothing. We just ran into each other. It was just one night. I didn’t plan it. Nothing came of it. I’m even trying to set him up with one of my friends…” John Paul rambles on and on.

“Shut up.” I whisper.

“What?”

“SHUT UP!” I shout at him. “I don’t want to hear anymore."


	19. Chapter 19

**John Paul**

I’m stunned. Oh shit. I totally fucked up. This is not cool. I was just standing here with Craig chatting to Ben about the night we met at the bar when suddenly Craig turns white as a sheet and looks like he’s going to throw up. I wonder what brought this on.

Ben helps me get him to the car

I’m completely ashamed when Craig looks up at me with his brown puppy dog eyes full of hurt. B-but… my head spins as it finally hits me. It’s not like I cheated on him. We hadn’t even kissed at that point. He asks the question, barely choking it out and my rambling answer does nothing to indicate not guilty on my part. I knew Craig slept with Ben, but I slept with him too anyway. Holy shit! I am such a loser. A total violation of the Bro Code.

We get the scene cleared as the flatbed removes the last car. Heading back to the car, it’s apparent that Craig is no longer talking to me and when I open my mouth to speak, he either shushes me or glares so hard, I’m afraid he’s going to hurt himself. The rest of the night is so painful that I can barely stand it and have never wished so hard for the clock to speed up.

************************************************************************

The next afternoon Craig calls in sick and I end up on the dispatch desk listening to the woes of the townsfolk who are unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end of my ire. It got so bad that Tommy sent me upstairs to do court security. I text Craig constantly, saying how sorry I am. Then I send him photos of those unlucky souls who are waiting to be called before the judge. Labeling the photos with witty comments that I know he would laugh at if he wasn’t so fucking pissed off at me.

I grow bored of that too and just sit and wait for the last of the defendants to finish up their paperwork and get the hell out of the building. I have an hour and a half to go that I spend chatting with Special Police Officer Rita who covers court. Her job function is to run files around and reprimand anyone who talks during the session.

Once the fines are paid, I walk the violations bureau workers to their office and help Rita lock up. We get to talking and she tells me about her husband and kids. It’s amazing the way she glows about them. I want that. I want to have someone to glow about. I waste more time helping her clean up the courtroom and getting everything set up for the council meeting tomorrow.

“What’s the matter?” She asks me. I guess she caught me staring into space again. I’ve developed a bad habit of doing that from time to time. I find it easy to talk to her and spill it all.

“Well, I was seeing someone and I thought we were getting kind of serious until last night when they found out I’d slept with their ex.” I explain.

“Yikes.” She responds looking at me with sympathy. “Were you dating this person when you slept with the ex?”

“No, no… It was just before we started seeing each other. And, God, I really do miss them.” I say wistfully.

“So what are you going to do about it?” She asks.

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen them since last night. I tried calling and texting. I just don’t what else to do.” I say sadly.

“Are you sorry?” She asks retrieving the keys for the back door.

“Absolutely. It totally wasn’t worth this. I mean, had I known that we would have hit it off like we did, I would never have slept with the ex.” I explain.

“You need to make it up to them then.” She says wisely.

“But how?” I ask.

“I don’t know. You could go the traditional route of flowers or candy or jewelry is a nice way to say you’re sorry. You need to find out what’s going to get you back in their good graces. What do they value most in this world?” She inquires.

“I’m guessing loyalty right about now.” I say wistfully.

So Rita gives me a lot to think about. I guess being married for seven years with two kids gives her a bit more experience in the whole relationship arena. Experience that I just have no clue about.

 **Craig**

I’m done. I’m hurt. I can’t even think straight. The thought of John Paul with Ben makes me feel so sick. When our shift is over, I bolt out of the station and race home and go straight to bed. I don’t move or get up or go anywhere or call anyone. I turn off my phone and lie under the covers pretending that I never heard about the two of them. I call in sick the next day and just lie in bed some more.

Finally, I get myself together. Wallowing in self pity is not my style and sulking in bed is not what I want to be doing in bed. I go to work putting on my indifferent face that I used to wear every day, the face that McQueen took away from me.

And as luck would have it Tommy corners me first thing and drags me to his office.

“What’s going on, Craig?” He asks shutting the door.

“What no good afternoon?” I respond in my smartass way, smirking.

“Dean, I am not in the mood. What the hell is going on with you and McQueen?" He demands again.

“N-nothing. Did he say something?” I say too quickly, my mask slipping a bit and I cringe inside. Tommy just sizes me up.

“No, that’s why I’m asking you. He moped around here all shift yesterday. He was a wiseass to people who called the desk. He was sent upstairs to court where I thought he would stay out of trouble.” He explains.

“What happened in court?” I ask.

“Well, when court was over, it seems that he delayed Rita up there for over an hour. And I’d think there was more to it if I hadn’t met her husband and saw how nauseatingly happy they are.” I just nod wondering where this is going. So John Paul’s being a bit bitchy, who cares? “Is there a problem I should know about?” He asks again.

“Not one that I can see.” I say quickly, mask in place.

“If this continues I will have to reassign him.” Tommy says. Shit, I can’t have that. It would look really bad for both of us.

“Duly noted.” I say.

“All right, get to work then.” He orders.

“See ya later, Tom.” I say getting up and heading for the door.

“One more thing, Craig, if you can’t work with him, let me know. It’s too dangerous out there if you won’t watch each other’s backs.” He warns me.

“I got ya.” I say.

Holy fuck, I can feel the sweat dripping down my back as I leave the office.

***********************************************************************

I nod to McQueen when I find him sitting in the break room waiting for me. “You ready?” I ask.

He sighs and nods following me out to the car.

We drive around for a bit in total silence. He doesn’t speak. He just stares out the window. I can’t help but steal a glance at him every once in awhile.

“Was it worth it?” I ask shattering the quiet.

“Huh?” He answers.

“I said, was it worth it?” I repeat.

“No.” He mumbles.

“Why did you do it?” I demand.

“There was no reason… Craig, you and I weren’t even together then… We hadn’t even kissed yet.” He says quietly, resigned.

“Yeah, but you knew… you knew I had been with Ben. That’s just not cool.” I hiss at him.

“I know.” He quietly assents. “Does this mean…” He gulps, “Does this mean we’re over?”

“I don’t know. I just don’t trust you right now.” I say. He turns to face the window again.

“Can you stop here?” He points to a Dunkin Donuts.

I pull into the lot. He hops out of the car and is in the store in a matter of seconds.

 

 **John Paul**

I run into the Dunkin Donuts and head straight to the restroom. Locking myself in a stall I sit down and try to get myself under control. But I can’t. I sit and cry like a fucking teenage girl. I sob silently into my hands blowing my nose in the extremely inadequate toilet paper.

Oh my God, is this what I’ve been reduced to. I don’t cry. I’ve never cried over a guy or a girl before. Why can’t I get a grip? I feel so guilty. I can’t believe thinking with my dick has cost me the best thing that’s happened to me in a long time. There is no way I could have predicted this. It was so not worth it and I’ve been thinking of ways to make it up to Craig. But I just don’t see how.

About 10 minutes later, I manage to pull myself together, wash my face and hands then pulling on a pair of sunglasses. I get us two cups of coffee and head back to the car.

 **Craig**

I’ve been sitting out here for 15 fucking minutes already. Where did he fucking go? There he is. I sigh, glad that he’s back.

“I got this for you.” He says handing me a cup of coffee.

“Thanks.” I respond. I pull out of the lot and we continue with our shift sitting in silence and only speaking when we have to. This totally sucks.


	20. Chapter 20

**John Paul**

After our shift, I’m in the changing room getting out of my uniform and into my street clothes when the door opens.

“Oh sorry.” Craig says coming in to change his clothes.

“It’s okay, just shut the door.” I respond buckling up my belt. “My sister wants to meet me after work. I’m probably in for a nice lecture.” I explain as I finish pulling on my shirt in silence then tying my shoes and gathering my things while Craig just stands and watches.

“Oh, um… I’m just meeting some friends for a drink.” He says suddenly. I just nod a response.

“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry… about Ben.” I say as I stand up facing him for the first time.

He nods.

“If I knew that we were gonna, you know, be more than what we were.” I say gesturing between the two of us, “I’d have never done it.” Grabbing my bag, I go to walk past him and out the door.

“Uh huh.” He nods again. A beat. “John Paul?”

“Yeah.” I respond turning to face him.

“Have a good time tonight.” He says quietly.

“Thanks. You too.” I give a half smile and walk away.

************************************************************************

I walk into Boulevard and see Jacqui already waiting for me at a table. I take a deep breath and prepare for whatever lecture she’s ready to throw at me, but first I stop at the bar for a bottle of beer. I make my way over to the table.

“John Paul. Have a seat.” She greets me.

“Jacq.” I say sitting down and placing my drink on the table.

“How are you doing?” She asks staring through me. I swear she can read me like an open book.

“Fine.” I lie.

She clucks her tongue at me. “Don’t lie to me.” She says. “There’s something going on.”

“Well, since you seem to know everything, why don’t you tell me?” I snap at her.

“Don’t talk to me like that.” She reprimands me. “Okay, so I got a very interesting phone call yesterday.”

“Do tell.” I say rolling my eyes.

“Tommy Johnson called.” Which causes me to snap to attention. “Don’t look so surprised. Tommy and I were in the same class in high school.”

“Oh.” I say.

“Yeah, oh. So anyway, he told me there was a little tension between you and Craig Dean. Why don’t you tell your big sis all about it?” She prompts me.

Fuck! So I spill it. I spill all of it. The ride to pick up my car, the first kiss after dinner that night, the Kings of Leon concert and what happened after. No, I don’t give her the details. She doesn’t need to know that. And then I tell her what happened at the car accident call and how everything came to light. And how we’ve barely spoken to each other since then.

Jacqui wisely listens to it all. She doesn’t gasp or show surprise. It’s one of the things I love about her. She doesn’t judge and nothing shocks her anymore.

“So you like him?” She asks knowingly.

I nod my response. “I think I like him more than I’ve ever liked anyone before. I’ve been miserable.”

“I can tell.” She says. “John Paul, you know you have to get your shit together. I know you have no clue how to have a relationship. This is all so new to you. I think you have to talk to him.”

“I know. I just don’t know how.” I say sadly.

“It’ll be okay, Sweetie.” Jacqui says patting my hand. “We’ll figure something out.”

 **Craig**

I open the door to the bar and get hit with the noise first. Shit! I wish I’d never agreed to go out tonight. I wish I hadn’t walked into that room to change. I wish I didn’t just let him walk out the door. There are so many things I want to say to him and I just let him walk past me.

I spot my friends at the bar and plastering on a fake smile, I walk over.

“Craig! Hey man, glad you could make it.” The dark haired man greets me warmly.

“Hi Ben.” I respond patting him on the back.

“Oh there’s someone I want you to meet.” He gets the attention of the brunet next to him, “Craig, this is Spike, Spike, Craig.”

I stick out my hand to this guy who is currently appraising me up and down. He takes my hand and shakes it. He has tattoos up and down his arms. Then it hits me, Spike. John Paul’s friend Spike. Why can’t I get John Paul out of my head? Who names their kid Spike?

I order a beer taking the time to scan the room for anyone or anything of interest, but Ben interrupts me.

“I thought John Paul was coming with you.” He says.

“Oh, he said he had to meet his sister.” I say.

“Which one?” Spike inquires.

“He didn’t say.” I respond.

“How many does he have?” Ben asks.

“Five.” Spike and I answer in unison. I just look at him with distaste. How does he know so much about my partner. Then I check myself. He’s not mine, but I can’t believe we’re talking about him after I had to spend the last eight hours ignoring him.

And then I see him. He’s sitting by the window at a table with Jacqui. I just roll my eyes trying not to stare as they seem to be having an intense discussion. I drag my eyes away and focus on Ben and Spike. They’re sharing a private joke and Ben pecks Spike on the cheek. Again, I roll my eyes. I want that. I want someone to share a private joke with and peck on the cheek whenever I want. Argh!

Ben pulls me out of my thoughts, “How’s work been, Craig? Still listening to Tommy’s stories?”

“Oh yeah. He’s got a million of them. He was telling me about this time he was out serving warrants and the woman he was serving had been a former classmate and basically talked him around in circles until he forgot why he was there in the first place.” I say laughing at the memory.

“Classic McQueen.” Spike says.

“What?” I say startled.

“That was Jacqui. She was talking about it for days after.” He clarifies.

“Jacqui had a warrant out for her?” I ask surprised by this news.

“It was a few years ago, and she’s cleared up all her legal issues, but she can be damn wily when she wants to.” He says and Ben laughs.

“I have got to meet this Jacqui if she can put one over on Tommy.” Ben says.

“She’s right over there.” I point to the table. Shit! Why did I do that?

“Oh, come on.” Spike says grabbing Ben’s arm and heading over. I drag my feet behind.

“John Paul! Jacqui!” Spike calls out.

“Hey Spike.” They greet him. Everyone scrunches up and shifts so we all fit around the table. John Paul is squished between Spike and Jacqui, Ben and I sit across. We exchange greetings. John Paul won’t quite meet my eyes.

“And who is this?” Jacqui asks Spike licking her lips.

“Hands off. He’s mine.” Spike teases. “This is Ben.”

“Oh Ben.” She says knowingly looking at John Paul who stares at the table. I clench my fists under the table.

“Yeah, Ben wanted to meet you.” Spike says which snaps John Paul’s head up. “He wanted to meet the woman who gave Tommy Johnson the run around.”

 **John Paul**

Jacqui talks to me and gives me some really great advice. Who knew she’d actually be able to talk about a successful relationship.

I look up to see Spike heading to our table and fucking hell, Ben is right behind him, and then, shit, Craig brings up the rear, slowly but surely he is headed over.

I’ve been in awkward situations before, but I feel like I wish the floor would just swallow me whole. I can feel Craig’s eyes on me. He’s been watching me since they came and sat down. Ben, Spike and Jacqui carry on the conversation as Craig stares at me and I stare at the table. I’m wondering how much longer I need to stay before I can make an excuse to leave.

Suddenly, there’s an ear splitting shriek as Ben’s pager goes off. I breathe a sigh of relief as he gets up to respond to the call. He bends over and kisses Spike on the cheek. “Call you later.” I hear him whisper. Louder, he says, “It was nice to meet you.” to Jacqui and goodnight to me and Craig before running out the door.

“Well boys,” Jacqui says, “I hate to break up the party, but it’s getting late and I’ve got work tomorrow.”

“Good night, Jacqui.” We chorus.

“And thank you.” I say getting up to give her a hug.

“Don’t fuck this up.” She whispers.

“I won’t.” I promise her.

“So here we are.” Spike observes.

“Yeah. Here we are.” I agree and laugh, then Spike laughs and Craig glares at us.

“So you and Ben, huh?” I ask him.

“Oh he’s wonderful, John Paul. Thanks for setting that up.” He enthuses.

“No problem. You deserve someone nice.” I say to him. Spike has to be the unluckiest in love person I know. I think he’s my role model of what not to do since he throws his heart into every relationship.

“And that he is, if you know what I mean.” Spike nudges me.

“We all know what you mean.” Craig snaps at him rolling his eyes.

“Okay.” Spike says slowly, not wanting to cause a problem. “I should really… you know, go.” He says. “I’ve got an early morning tomorrow.” He gets up to leave.

“All right, good night, Spike. I’m glad things are working out for you and Ben.” I say sincerely.

“Good night.” Craig says dismissively.

“I’ll call you tomorrow.” He says. I just nod my response.

“What was that for?” I ask Craig.

“What?” He plays innocent for me.

“Why were you so rude to him?” I demand.

“No reason. He just irritates me.” Is his brilliant explanation.

“Okay.” I snort derisively.

“What?” He gets his back up.

“You just met him and he was perfectly nice, but he irritates you.” I say incredulous.

“Yeah.” He responds.

“Whatever. Maybe you’re a little jealous?” I accuse.

“No.” He spits out quickly.

“Yes you are. You can’t stand that Ben is with him.” I accuse.

“No.” He denies again. “You are so far off the mark.”

“Then tell me.” I order.

“How long have you known Spike?” He confuses me with this new line of questioning.

“I don’t know. We went to grammar school together, so I guess we were 6 or something.” I try to remember.

“And you never slept with him?” He asks.

“Spike?! No. We’re just friends.” I defend.

“Oh.” He looks defeated.

“You thought Spike and I were together?” I ask him.

“Yeah.” He admits.

“All right. Let’s go.” I say downing my beer.

“Wh-what?” He stutters.

“You and I need to talk and I’m not going to have this conversation in a room full of strangers.” I say getting to my feet.

I drag him out to the parking lot where we climb into Craig’s car to talk. I don’t know where to start and the silence settles in. Craig sighs.

“So what did you want to say?” He asks after the silence lasts a bit too long.

I gather up my courage and just pour my heart out.

“Craig, I never meant to hurt you…”

“But you did.” He interrupts.

I take a deep breath, “Please just let me get through this and then you can rant and rave and accuse all you want.” He nods and waves his hand for me to go on. “Okay… what I did was wrong. But you have to understand that I had no idea that my feelings for you were so strong.

The first time we kissed, after dinner that night, there was nothing I wanted so desperately in the world than to kiss you right at that moment. You have to know that I haven’t even looked at anyone since that night. And then after the concert, I was just, I don’t know, I guess I was scared. I’ve never wanted anyone like I want you, Craig. I’ve never needed anyone as much. And the time we spent together and the friendship we have, or had, it scared me because I’ve never felt this way before.

And it’s all gone and it’s all my fault. I can live with that, but I can’t live without you. So even if we didn’t date or anything else, I just really want my friend back. We were friends once and it hurts that we’re not anymore.”

 **Craig**

I sit here stunned. I wasn’t expecting this. He wants to be my friend. I don’t want to be his fucking friend. Why can’t he see that?

“I don’t want to be friends.” I finally say, maybe my voice is a little too harsh from the emotion, but he completely takes it the wrong way.

“Okay.” He says eyes shining with tears as he scrambles for the door handle. I grab his other hand.

“Where are you going?” I ask confused by his reaction.

“You don’t want to be my friend.” He responds in a small voice as he pulls the handle.

“No! Don’t go.” I shout.

“What?” He breathlessly asks.

“I don’t want you to go.” I adamantly say.

“I don’t get it. Are you teasing me?” He accuses, the pitch of his voice rising.

And there it is. I leap across the gear shift and grab his face pulling it to mine before my lips cover his. It only takes a second for him to respond, for his hand to fall off the door handle and come around my back pulling me in as close as he can in the small space.

My tongue darts out asking for entrance and his mouth opens up granting it. I feel like I’m free falling, my heart is pounding and my stomach is doing flip flops. I can feel the heat of his mouth and the desperation in our kiss as our tongues dance together in the intensity.

I understand what he’s saying because right now in this moment, I want him more than I have ever wanted anyone or anything in my entire life. Do you know what that feels like?


	21. Chapter 21

**Craig**

“Don’t look at me like that.” I say squirming uncomfortably in the driver’s seat.

“I wasn’t.” John Paul denies grinning.

“You’re salivating.” I accuse him.

“I can’t help it. You’re hot.” He states leering at me.

“Oh for fuck’s sake.” I say exasperated, my uniform trousers feeling a little too tight.

“Nope, you can’t deny it.” He says grinning at me in a most lascivious way.

~oOo~

So, we’re back on track. Or at least I think we are. Actually I know we are. It’s been amazing, which is what has led us to where we are now. I reluctantly agreed to go out with Ben and Spike for a drink after work. The four of us are sitting around drinking at Boulevard playing I Never like the complete grown ups that we are.

“I never slept with Craig.” Spike says, so Ben and John Paul tap their bottles together and drink to me.

“I never fired a gun.” Ben says, so John Paul and I shrug at each other and drink.

“I never threw up on a roller coaster.” John Paul says, so Spike and I drink while John Paul and Ben laugh at us.

“I never took it up the ass.” I say and to my delight the other three drink while glaring at me, which was a nice victory until they started calling me ass cherry and virgin ass for the rest of the night.

~oOo~

Getting out of Ben’s car after getting completely smashed is proving to be a difficult task. Thankfully Ben switched from beer to soda about halfway through the game and was the only one sober enough to drive.

“Thanksh for the ride, Ben.” I slur shutting the car door, pushing John Paul ahead of me, lest he should get lost walking to the front door.

John Paul stumbles up the stairs in front of me.

“Shhhhhhhhhh!” I shush him rather loudly and I hear the door unlock and see Mrs. Harper stick her head out into the hall. “Hi, Mrs. Harper.” I stage whisper.

“Good night, boys.” She smiles, winks and retreats back into her apartment.

“I think we woke up Mrs. Harper.” I whisper loudly to John Paul who is hopping from foot to foot on the landing.

“I don’t care who we woke up, I have to pee. Open the fucking door.” He says loudly.

“Shhhhhh.” I say opening the door for him as he runs for the bathroom. I flop down on the couch. I think we might be a little drunk.

John Paul comes out of the bathroom trying to do a sexy strut, but he keeps stumbling and I can’t stop laughing. Trying to get out of his tee shirt, he just manages to get stuck in the material as it twists around his arms.

“Craig,” he whines, “help me.”

“Okay.” I laugh at him and push him down on the couch to help untangle the shirt from around his arms and head. Finally his bright blue eyes are revealed to me. God, he’s just so gorgeous. Beautiful even. I lean in and give him a quick kiss, just a brief brush of the lips.

He leans back on the couch.

“Hey,” he beckons me closer, so I lean in a bit, “I think you’re drunk.” He says like it’s a big secret then leans back and closes his eyes.

“Hey,” I call to get his attention. His eyes flutter open and he tries to focus on me. “Was that a secret?”

“No. I just thought you’d want to know.” He says pondering a moment. “Hey, what did you mean you never took it up the ass?”

“Oh… uh…” I was not expecting that. “I think it’s self explanatory.”

“Okay.” He muses a bit. “Why not?” He asks innocently enough.

I don’t know how to explain this one to him. I don’t know how to explain my fears. How I don’t want to give up total control like that. How I’ve never trusted anyone enough to let them do that to me. I say the only thing I can think of. “I just haven’t, okay?”

 **John Paul**

I know I’m drunk, but it seems like Craig was holding off on his answer. But my thoughts are too muddled to dwell on it.

“You don’t know what you’re missing.” I sigh. “It’s just… amazing.” I lean into him again slurring my words into a sexy whisper, but thinking I sound eloquent. “When it’s done right, it’s the best feeling in the world. Just imagine your every nerve ending set on edge and when you think you can’t stand it anymore, your whole world explodes into a Technicolor. And the release is so intense you can barely stand it as your breath hitches and your body falls into a totally relaxed state of complete satiation.”

Craig shudders at my description and the lust that fills his eyes gets my cock stirring. He stands up and holds out his hand, “Come on.” He whispers hoarsely. I grasp it and he pulls me off the couch and unfortunately I fall on the floor thumping down hard.

“Shhhhh.” Craig chastises me in between his giggles, but I’m laughing too hard. “You’ll wake Mrs. Harper.” He admonishes me.

We finally make it into the bedroom. Where did my shirt go? We fall onto the bed together after stripping our clothes off. I actually manage to get my pants off without tripping.

I think I’m a little drunk as I land on Craig’s bed and the room does a dizzying tilt. Craig practically lands on top of me and hungrily devours my mouth with his. He quickly lets go and places kisses down my neck, across my shoulder and then runs down my chest and abs. Craig slides down between my legs and places soft kisses on the back of my thigh. My head lolls back with the ecstasy of his touch, but I end up banging my head on the wooden headboard.

“Ow.” I exclaim.

“Are you okay?” He looks up concerned.

“Yeah, yeah.” I respond shaking my head to clear it a bit. “Carry on.” I say dismissively waving my hand.

 **Craig**

His description has set me off and my cock is dangerously hard. I lick around his length taking him completely in my mouth as his hands drunkenly grab at my head. I bob up and down his long prick eliciting moans and grunts from him. He’s trying to buck up into my mouth, but I hold him down for fear he might choke me. With a final groan, he cums in my mouth and I swallow it down.

I look up at John Paul. His eyes are closed. Did he just snore?

Oh my God! He passed out. What a lightweight.

I snuggle up next to him, close my eyes and I guess I’ll be taking matters into my own hands tonight as I stroke myself to completion, then fall asleep next to him.


	22. Chapter 22

**John Paul**

I’m heading into the end of my probation period. My six months riding with Craig are almost up. I’ll be getting my own car and maybe even another shift. I don’t want to think about that right now. I know I’ll really miss Craig when we’re not together in the cruiser all the time. We meet in our normal spot before shift with Craig teasing Hess before we make it out the door. We walk through the lot to the patrol car.

“What are you doing after work tonight?” Craig asks innocently.

“Nothing. I don’t have any plans.” I reply just as simply.

“Do you want to, I don’t know, come over or something? You know, to hang out?” He stammers out. It’s just so cute.

“Why, Officer Dean, are you propositioning me?” I say feigning shock in a nice Southern drawl.

“Shut up, you idiot. You owe me one.” He retorts.

“And don’t I know it, as you keep subtly reminding me.” I state.

We get in the car for another exciting evening of fighting crime.

“You might want to shave that shit off your face.” I suggest.

“What? You don’t like it? Isn’t it sexy?” He asks scratching at the stubble.

“It is, but it leaves a very nasty rash in a very sensitive area.” I complain.

“Oh, well it is a bit itchy, maybe it’s time to shave.” He agrees.

After cruising around town for an hour or so, we get a call.

“415.” Is the voice that breaks the monotony.

I sigh and answer, “415.”

“We got a report of a DV at 184 Stefanic. No details, neighbor called and said there was a lot of loud arguing.”

“On our way.” I respond.

“Received, 21:13.” Comes the voice.

Craig guides the car to Stefanic and we stop in front of 184. It’s a wide open residential street. We both get out and head up the front walk to the door.

That’s when I hear it. A shot rings out, whining over our heads. It’s almost like slow motion as Craig and I turn to look at each other, then we both do a 180 and run diving behind the car.

“Get over here behind the engine block.” Craig whispers loudly to me. Shit! He’s right. I scurry over as a shot whines over my head. I swear to God if I get out of this alive, I’m going to settle down, go to church, be nicer to my mother, anything to get my ass out of here. We draw our weapons and wait for backup.

Craig’s staring at me. Whispering into the mic, “We need back up. This nut’s got a gun. Sounds like a semi automatic, small caliber. 184 Stefanic. Bring them in dark and silent.” He’s trembling, which is scaring the shit out of me. I expect him to be the strong one to back me up and haul my ass out of trouble. Who’s coming to save us now as we crouch huddled behind the car?

Craig gestures to me to put in my earpiece so we can hear the radio without alerting the general public. He silences his cell phone and indicates I should do the same.

I hear the crunch of tires as another car pulls up behind ours. Thorpe rolls out of his car onto the ground and another shot rings out. “Fuck, this guy’s nuts.” He whispers gun drawn as he crouches down.

Craig nods as an acknowledgement.

“They’ve got county coming in from the back, he’ll be taken out by the SWAT team not us. We’re just here to distract him.” Thorpe informs us.

“And act like targets, great.” Craig comments rolling his eyes.

“We’ll be okay.” Thorpe responds, which earns him another eye roll.

It feels like hours we’re waiting, but it’s probably no more than 45 minutes. Crouched behind the car, kneeling on the asphalt, my back is killing me, but I’d rather the pain than be dead. I don’t think my heart can take much more as it’s pounding in my chest and the blood is rushing too quickly through my body.

We sit and listen to the chatter on the radio. We can hear as they assemble the SWAT team, ghostly voices whispering through the earpiece. We can’t respond as we don’t want to draw attention to our vulnerable position crouched in the street like sitting ducks.

 **Craig**

I try to remain calm if not for my sake then for John Paul’s. He’s too new to be put in a situation like this. One wrong decision by either of us could be a difference between life and death. We share terrified looks between us. We don’t dare to talk, instead relying on non verbal communication.

I listen intently for any noise coming from the house, but it’s quiet now. The gunman is silent and the arguing is over, I assume the other person, he or she, is probably dead. The wait is killing me. I try to regulate my breathing, it wouldn’t help to keel over and pass out in the street.

Finally, we hear confirmation that SWAT is ready to storm the house. They have been watching and there’s been no movement inside. Using the infrared heat camera, they’ve pinpointed a cooling body in a downstairs room and a hot body next to the front door.

The SWAT team arrives through the backyard of the house entering the rear door, which causes the gunman to explode through the front door firing randomly at anyone or anything or most likely just aimlessly hoping to hit something. We’re still ducked behind the car. I can hear John Paul taking deep breaths trying not to hyperventilate.

I can feel every nerve ending in my body and I’m coiled, ready to pounce. Curiosity gets the better of me and I can’t help myself, I just have to see where he’s headed. I can hear his footsteps across the grass when he takes a break from firing or maybe he’s reloading the magazine.

I can see Thorpe with his gun up trained over the hood of his car. John Paul hasn’t moved a muscle, gun up, taking slow even breaths.

I crane my neck up to peek over the hood of the car and he’s standing on the sidewalk just on the other side with this maniacal look on his face. This is a man with nothing left to lose. He’s staring directly into my eyes and raises the gun aiming it straight at me.

I gasp at the lunacy, the evil that seems to be pouring out of this crazed man whose name I don’t even know as he squeezes the trigger pointing right at my face. I can’t drag my eyes away from him even though every thought in my head is screaming at me to do just that. But the sudden movement from my right startles me backwards as a body hurtles in front of me forcing me backwards onto the ground.

I hear the bullet strike its target that is where my face just was. I’m lying on my back and my head bounces off the pavement underneath me causing stars to explode behind my eyes. And everything goes black for a moment.


	23. Chapter 23

**The End**

 **Craig**

I come to consciousness aware of a weight on my chest. I struggle to sit up pulling the weight with me when it groans and I realize what it is.

“You fucking idiot!” I shout grabbing John Paul and uprighting him in my lap, tears rolling down my face.

“It was going to hit you.” John Paul replies breathless as I wrap my arms around him.

“You could have been killed!” I sob pulling him as close as I can.

“So could have you.” He says in my ear.

“I love you! Why did you do that? I could have lost you.” I wail pushing him back so I can look him in the eyes.

“I did it because I love you too.” He says wiping the tears from my face. “I’m just going to have a little bruising where the bullet hit the vest.” He tries to reason with me.

“Oh my God.” I utter when I realize how close we both came to getting shot. I cry harder than I’ve ever cried before.

“Shh, it’s okay. I’m okay.” He reassures me. He leans his forehead against mine and stares into my eyes. “I’m not going anywhere and neither are you.” He sweeps his thumbs across my cheeks wiping the tears.

“Did you say you loved me?” I ask once my sobbing gets under control.

“Yes.” He whispers.

“Oh.” I respond leaning in and kissing him as hard as I can.

~oOo~

John Paul and I are both transported to the hospital. He checks out okay, just a bit of bruising on his back from where the bullet struck his vest. No broken ribs. I’m okay too just a huge lump on the back of my head, but no concussion.

We later find out that Thorpe shot the crazy son of a bitch in the head after he fired at us. I couldn’t even look at the car where the guy landed smearing blood all across the hood. We’ve both been placed on medical leave for the next week and then we need to have a check up before being cleared to go back to work.

~oOo~

“Up against the wall.” John Paul orders with a growl.

I take the position, arms stretched, palms flat against the wall, legs spread.

“Are you comfortable?” He asks menacingly.

I nod my response.

“Can’t have that.” He whispers a hairsbreadth from my ear and kicks my legs wider apart while holding my hips.

He disarms me. No, literally, he snaps open the holster on my belt and slides the gun lovingly out and places it gently on the dresser.

“Face forward.” He barks catching me watching him over my shoulder. He starts unsnapping the belt stays that hold my utility belt on as I whip my head forward to face the wall again. Snap, snap, snap is the only sound besides my labored breathing. I am dying with anticipation, relinquishing control to him is completely turning me on.

The belt drops to the floor with a loud clunk. John Paul reaches for my shoulder. “Turn around, Craig.” He whispers in my ear. I comply to meet the blue eyes that I want to surrender myself to. His fingers tremulously reach for the buttons on my shirt and he pulls up the material to reveal the zipper hidden beneath. Unzipping my shirt, he pulls it from my trousers and slides it effortlessly off my body.

He reaches out for the Velcro straps holding my vest on, slowly peeling each away and removing it, baring me to his seeking eyes.

“Can I?” I ask reaching out for the tee shirt he’s been wearing since the hospital. He nods his assent and I slowly pull it off as he winces in pain. “Turn around.” I quietly ask. My fingers lightly trace the bruise that is evident in the middle of his back. His reward for his sacrifice for me. I lean over to gently kiss the deep purple mark that mars his perfect skin. “Does it hurt?” I ask.

“A little.” He replies breathlessly shivering under my touch.

“I’m sorry.” I reply turning him around again.

“Don’t be. Just having you here is worth the pain.” He says staring into my eyes. I can’t bear to look at him any longer. I disarm him sliding the gun from his holster and placing it on the dresser next to mine. Then start unsnapping the belt stays

“I can’t believe that asshole ruined my shirt.” He blurts out.

I chuckle a little, “Is that the strongest word you can think of?”

“No, how about that low down, good for nothing, crazy ass, psychotic, mother fucking son of a bitch?” He casually states.

“Much better.” I reply drinking in his stoic features.

“It’s really not funny.” He says suddenly.

“I know, but if I don’t laugh, I don’t think I’ll ever stop crying.” I say.

“Can’t have my boyfriend crying when I give him what I owe him.” He smiles flirting with me.

“You don’t owe me anything.” I sigh, then light bulb. “Did you just call me your boyfriend?”

“Yes. It’s okay right?” He asks nervously.

“Absolutely perfect.” I say dropping his belt to the floor. I follow it down unzipping his boots and urging him out of them and then doing my own.

 **John Paul**

When Craig stands up again, I unclasp his trousers and send them to the floor along with his boxers in one fell swoop and he does the same for mine. I push him onto the bed and crawl my way up to meet him. Capturing his lips in a searing kiss, I press my body full length down upon his. I just want to feel him, his heart his pounding and I think that’s all the reassurance I need that he’s still here and still alive.

Our erections are sliding against each other and I feel the groan of pleasure in his throat. His arms are gingerly sliding up my sides like he’s afraid to hurt me. I break off the kiss and look into his eyes shuffling to the side a bit. “I’m not going to break.”

“I know. I just don’t want to hurt you.”

“I’ll tell you if it hurts, okay?”

“Okay.” He says nodding. I lean in again.

“John Paul?” He calls softly.

“Yeah.” I answer curious.

“Would you… you know?” He asks hesitantly.

“Give you what I owe you.” I say playfully.

“No… no, not that. The other thing, we were talking about the other night.”

My eyes widen in surprise. I think it’s the last thing I ever expected to hear from him. “Yeah, are… are you sure?”

He just nods. Now I’m a complete nervous wreck. But I strap my courage on and thoroughly kiss him until we’re breathless. Kissing my way down his neck, carefully teasing his nipples into hardened buds. I can tell Craig is unsure where to put his hands, so he settles them in my hair scratching my scalp as I kiss lower and lower down his body. My tongue delves into his navel earning me a moan of pleasure that causes a small grin to cross my lips.

I blow on the tip of his hard erect cock watching as it twitches in anticipation. I bypass that though and head further down nipping at Craig’s inner thigh and watching the goosebumps appear. His hands fall to the side clutching the sheets. And my hands cup his butt cheeks pushing them up higher and spreading them apart to marvel at the pucker of flesh. I place my lips over his hole and an unearthly growl emanates from Craig’s glorious mouth. My tongue laves the opening and I hear panting breaths from him. I curl my tongue and push past the muscle swirling it and pushing as far as I can go.

“I’m gonna… I’m gonna…” Are the breathless words coming from him. “Unh.” Craig cums hard hips bucking up in the air. I crawl up his body licking the tip of his penis on the way.

“I’ve never cum like that before.” He pants out. “Is that what you were talking about the other night?”

“No, Craig, we haven’t even gotten to the good part yet.” I promise.

“Holy shit, really?” He asks surprised.

“Would I lie to my boyfriend?” I grin at him then lick my lips for the final act.

 **Craig**

He called me his boyfriend again and my stomach does a little somersault. His gaze penetrates through me. John Paul goes to get a towel to clean up my orgasm and I can’t help but wince at the giant purple bruise gracing his otherwise flawless back.

John Paul imprisons my mouth in another searing kiss until I’m seeing stars again. His hands flutter over my body caressing and soothing as well as exciting me all at the same time. He slowly glides one finger past my balls and enters finger into my opening slowly pressing in where his tongue had been minutes before. I can feel my body tense at the intrusion, but he distracts me by deepening the kiss. He slips a second finger in and then, oh my God, he hits this spot that causes my nerve endings to ignite. My cock swells eagerly at the sensation.

Another finger is added stretching me to a point I didn’t think was possible. His fingers keep brushing over my prostate causing these guttural groans from the impossible ecstasy his touch brings on.

John Paul breaks the kiss and reaches for the side table. My eyes follow his movement and he manages to find a condom and the lube and I just watch in awe as he sheaths his dick and drips the lube on.

“You okay?” He whispers as he lines his cock up to my entrance. I just nod a response.

He pushes in slowly allowing me time to get used to him inside me going in inch by inch. He pulls my hips up as he makes it all the way in and that little movement brings back the fireworks. John Paul starts to pull out slowly and pushes back in slowly. “You’re so tight.” He whispers into my neck sucking on it as he tries to control the speed of it.

“John Paul, please.” I whimper into his hair. And that’s all the encouragement he needs to speed up. Pulling back and slamming back in. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt a bit, but his thrusts hit my prostate time and time again making it totally worth it.

A sheen of sweat covers our bodies as we thrust together over and over. John Paul’s hand wends between us and he strokes my cock in time with his thrusts until my body can no longer take all the pleasurable sensations and my orgasm is drawn from me spilling between us causing me to cry out his name. John Paul’s movements become staccato thrusts and he cries out as he comes deep inside of me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so fulfilled before.

Withdrawing from me, John Paul lies down beside me, “I love you.” He says softly stroking my chest.

“I love you too.” I say pulling him closer to me.

~oOo~

We’re cleared to go back to work at our next check up. We’re still riding together for another week, but in a different car. I just couldn’t look at 415 the same way again. “408, come in.” Comes Hess’ voice over the radio.

“This is 408.”

“We’ve got a report of an alarm reaction at 319 Sycamore Lane.”

“Received, on our way.”

“Received, 01:13.”

“Let’s roll.”


End file.
